31 Truths Parents of Children With Special Needs Wish Others Understood

Life is all about understanding each other. That’s what we at The Mighty believe. So often when we interview parents of children with special needs, we hear a similar sentiment: “I wish others would take the time to understand…” 

So we thought we’d help that happen. We asked our Mighty bloggers and Facebook community what they wish other people understood about their child with special needs. These are their answers.

“We don’t want our daughter to be different. We don’t wish for a different version of her. We want he exactly as she is, wheelchair and all.”– Laurie Arnold

“Please know my son is doing the best he can.”–Carrie Carriello

“I’m not handling my daughter’s disability because God gave me as much as I can handle. It’s actually because of my own resilience and determination to make our lives as normal as possible.” –Serena Fuller

“People with disabilities are not less. They’re different.”–Lauren Jordan

“‘Oh, he looks normal’ is not a compliment.”–Melissa Montoya

“My daughter is so much more than a label.”–Gemma Bryan

“My son is capable of so much love.”–Gloria Payne Bearne

“I’d rather you ask me what’s wrong with my daughter than give me dirty looks.”–Alysaa Korzeniowski

“My boys are happy and full of joy even though they’re in wheelchairs.”–Kelly Mantoan

“Try throwing us a smile. If you only knew how such a small act of kindness can make a difference .”–April Shaw

“My daughter doesn’t expect you to be perfect. Why do you expect her to be? “– Shen Mager

“I want others to accept my child for who she is. To look close and see her goodness.”–Suzanna Perryman

“My son is a little boy. He is not a hero. He is not a victim. Sometimes he is happy, sometimes he is sad. Some days he is nice, some days (most days?) he is naughty. Pity is not the same as empathy and seeing my son for what he can’t do, rather than what he can, will hurt his chances to live a full and productive life far more than his disability ever could.” –Mary Evelyn Smith

 “A diagnosis can’t predict the extraordinary love you will have for your child.”–Tara McCallan

“My daughter responds best to patience, understanding and love.”–Shelli Burgio

“My son is more like your child than he is different.”–Talitha Snyder

“My son doesn’t need to be fixed. He’s perfect the way he is.”–Jennifer Brock

“Special needs parents (though we are super) do what we have to do not because we like to outdo average parents, but because it’s what we have to do.” –Tara Michele Clifton

“My child really is special needs (even if he doesn’t look like it).”–Valma Ashpaugh

“My son is a child. A wonderful, perfect child.”–Erin Szakos

“Children with special needs can hear you.”–Jenna Rae Furlong

“See the child beyond the disability.”–Alyssa Korzeniowski

“My son wants friends too! He just needs help and understanding.”–Cayla Duncan

“As hard as it is for everyone else, it’s even harder for her.”–Teri Bass

“You shouldn’t pretend you can’t see us at a park or community event. We need friends and communication too.”–Rachel Bradley

“There’s no reason for pity.”–Anne Wilson

“Stop staring as I comfort my 8-year-old son when he’s overwhelmed. He can be 15 for all I care. If he needs momma’s comforting, guess what? He’s going to get it!”–Vanessa Sanchez

“My son has a heart and feelings too!”–Sara Kinman Godby

“A diagnosis is a small part of a whole, 3-dimensional being.”–Molly Prive

“My child is not a hero, not a warrior, not a monster, not a poster child for his disease…just a little boy who likes boy things like baseball and cartoons, who hurts like a little boy when he is poked with needles too often, who laughs at silly things that little boys laugh at like farting and falling. He is just a little boy who has a failing body…and my love for him is as fierce, protective, devoted, sacrificial and as loyal as any good mother’s love can be–special needs or not.”–Anita Birk