To the Mom Who Found Herself Asking, ‘Why My Baby?’

unnamed (86) When my son was born 23 and a half years ago, I thought — no, I knew — that the sun, moon and stars all rose and set because of him. My world was complete; it was perfect. When he was 18 months old, my world changed… his world changed.

It all changed with one seizure, followed by hundreds of seizures. Many, many hospital stays and tests later, there were still no answers as to why. I just wanted to know, Why my baby? 

I didn’t know that the seizures were not the only “why” I’d be asking later on. At age 3 came the autism diagnosis. Doctors were telling me all of the things my son would never do. I was heartbroken, not for myself — well, maybe a little — but mostly for him. I decided to research and research and research until I found that one doctor who believed in my son. He made all the difference. Instead of telling me the things my son would never accomplish, he gave me the hope and the passion to see the things my son would — and has –accomplished.

Screen Shot 2015-01-19 at 4.26.21 PM There have been other obstacles thrown in along our journey — Type 1 Diabetes at age 12, being one of them. But like the trooper that he is, he faces it head on. If I could go back twenty years and give myself advice it would be this:

 Do not let negativity trump positivity!

If there is a will, there is a way. And don’t try to be Superwoman. Ask for help. Involve others in our journey. Don’t think that just because they don’t walk in my shoes they won’t understand. Spread awareness. Do not ever feel sorry for yourself or your child. 

My son is now 23. He’s accomplished a lot, and, he still has way more to accomplish in his life. And I will be right there beside of him every single step of the way. My son is still just as perfect to me as he was the day he was born! I was right. I know the sun, moon and stars all rise and set because of him.

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