To Friends and Family Who See Me Sharing Articles About Borderline Personality Disorder
I know it can seem annoying or like I am pushing information at you, but I really just want you to understand. I keep hoping to find articles I can relate to that can describe more eloquently than I can what it is I live with every day.
You see, I love you, and I want you to know why it is I cancel plans with what looks like no good reason, or why I decline to do something that seems simple to anyone else but causes panic attacks in me. I want you to know on the days I seem to be out of control or so wildly emotional that it’s not me just being melodramatic. I have a brain that is wired incorrectly from trauma. I have to live every day with that brain, and it will never recover.
Yes, I go to therapy, and I learn tools to put in my toolbox of coping mechanisms. Yes, I have medication to help with the depression and anxiety that comes along with my diagnosis. However, I often feel so uncomfortable or judged when I try and talk about it from my perspective that most of the time all I can do is share the articles that ring with truth to me — the articles I feel describe what I am dealing with every day.
Having a personality disorder that undermines my own self-confidence at every turn means that much of the time I feel like I am nothing but a burden on those I love. I’m sharing articles to my social media in a quiet attempt to help you understand.
So when you pass by a new article I’ve posted, take a moment to read it and try to understand what I am conveying by sharing it. Don’t be afraid to ask me questions. I won’t offer information otherwise due to my own inherent fear of being rejected for the challenges I face. I am trying to be more open about who I am and what I am facing. I hope you can do the same.
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