What Reminds Me to Keep the Promise I Made in Eating Disorder Recovery
My mum hates tattoos, absolutely hates them.
“Why would you put something permanent on your body when you’ll only regret it later?”
So naturally, when I decided upon (and got) my tattoo, I was skeptical as to my mum’s reaction; but this one was important to me and I knew I would never regret it.
My tattoo was permanent and that’s just what I needed, and also why I waited until a certain point to get it done. That point was weight restoration; a point I had feared for so long, but a point I was desperate to reach in order to get my tattoo.
The eating disorder recovery symbol as the stem is to remind me that just as a flower’s stem is the beginning of their life, my recovery is the beginning of mine and I had so much to fill it with. The lotus flower grows from muddy waters — to me it represents that no matter what place you’ve come from, you can still be beautiful and good things can sometimes come out of murky waters.
Every time I’m struggling I look at my tattoo and I remind myself of the promise I made, to never go backwards, to use recovery as my stem and grow a beautiful, happy life from there.
And even my mum loves it.
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Unsplash photo via Daniel Spase