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Why I'm Letting Therapy be 'My Therapy'

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Editor's Note

If you live with an eating disorder, the following post could be potentially triggering. You can contact the Crisis Text Line by texting “NEDA” to 741741.

It’s all too common to see the slogan, “______ is my therapy.” That blank is usually filled in with hobbies such as travel, music, yoga, running, etc. The idea these outlets can serve as therapeutic definitely rings true for many of us, but it is important to ask, are these things truly therapeutic?

If you had asked me three years ago, I would have said running was my therapy. I was obsessed. Running helped me cope with life’s stresses. It gave me the feeling I could handle all of my problems, and that I was able to maintain a facade of control. The thing was, running wasn’t really serving me therapeutically. Quite the opposite. It was allowing me to disconnect from my feelings by suppressing my emotions underneath physical exertion. What I thought was therapy was actually a form of suppression for me. I wasn’t dealing with my problems; I was burying them deep within. Furthermore, when I did not run, I felt incredibly anxious. The need to run outweighed so many other of my basic needs, and I found myself more anxious by the idea of not running than by life itself. Running then became an integral part of my eating disorder which took many years to overcome.

Now, this is not to say all hobbies become addictions. For most, activities outside of work or home can be enjoyable outlets and valuable coping strategies. The problem arises when one activity or hobby becomes your sole coping skill. When the idea of not doing something causes more anxiety than the anxiety you felt in the first place. Yes, it may be helping you temporarily, but is it really helping you feel better? Or is it causing you to feel numb? While my example of running may seem extreme, it is not uncommon for a hobby that started out as enjoyable to become toxic.

Please know there is zero shame in allowing actual therapy to be your therapy. It may not be as catchy of a saying, but it is true. That said, it is important to acknowledge therapy can be expensive. I have been very fortunate to be able to afford my own therapy, but I know that is not always the case for everyone. Still, therapy comes in many different forms and can be accessed in different ways. I wholeheartedly believe it is an investment worth making if you are able to. I was also intimidated by the idea of talking about my problems with a stranger, but starting therapy was one of the best self-care practices of my life. Some days I leave therapy laughing, while on other days I leave crying. It is not easy work, but it is so worthwhile. While hobbies and exercise can help with stress relief, it will probably only get you so far. I have found it is through therapy I can work through the core issues that caused my stress in the first place. No matter where you are in life, I think therapy can be beneficial. You are deserving to have hobbies you love while also receiving the help that you need. Therapy is my therapy, and it can be your therapy too.

Getty image by YakobchukOlena

Originally published: October 28, 2019
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