6 Lessons I've Learned From Having a Boyfriend Who Has Cerebral Palsy Like I Do
With Valentine’s Day soon approaching, I tend to think about my relationship with my boyfriend and what I’ve been able to learn from his journey with cerebral palsy. Here are the lessons he has taught me.
1. It’s OK to express your emotions about cerebral palsy.
Before meeting my boyfriend, I always had trouble expressing my emotions, especially when it came to my own cerebral palsy. However, he has taught me it’s OK to express your emotions and embrace them for what they are.
2. It’s OK to do things at a slower pace than others when you live with cerebral palsy.
Before I got to know my boyfriend, I always gave myself a hard time when I didn’t complete my goals fast enough, but he taught me that it’s OK to go a little slower when I need to. My cerebral palsy doesn’t make me any less capable of achieving my goals.
3. Anyone with cerebral palsy is capable of finding love — no matter what they think.
Prior to meeting my boyfriend, I struggled with dating and putting myself out there because most of the people I tried to pursue relationships with didn’t understand my challenges. They sometimes had a hard time breaking down the barrier between my physical limitations and who I am as a person. Now, though, my relationship with my current boyfriend always teaches me that even if you face challenges in life, you can still find true love.
4. Living with cerebral palsy is an adventure when your partner has it too.
Although I’ve always believed that life with cerebral palsy is an adventure, after meeting my boyfriend, I realized that I wasn’t alone. Sharing this adventure with my boyfriend makes the journey with cerebral palsy worthwhile.
5. Don’t be ashamed of the obstacles you face with cerebral palsy.
Before meeting my boyfriend, I had a hard time discussing certain obstacles in my life, especially when they were related to my cerebral palsy. My boyfriend has taught me that there’s nothing wrong with sharing the challenges you face and letting your partner help you through them.
6. It’s OK to be unapologetically disabled.
I used to find myself apologizing for making people uncomfortable because of the accommodations that I needed as a young woman with cerebral palsy. My boyfriend, though, is confident in expressing his needs with his cerebral palsy. He has shown me it’s OK to express your needs and be unapologetic about them — it doesn’t make you a “bad” person.
Ultimately, having a partner with the same disability as you can teach you many lessons that you never expected to learn, which can truly help you grow. Don’t be afraid to embrace the beautiful journey you’re on in life with a disability.
Image via contributor.
Tylia L. Flores is a twenty-eight-year-old born with Spastic Cerebral Palsy. Despite her condition that affects her mobility, she does not allow it to affect her will and determination to make a difference in the world. Through her many life challenges and obstacles, she discovered her passion for writing. Tylia’s goal in life is to share her stories with the world. In doing so, she hopes to help others with disabilities realize that they, too, have the potential to make their dreams come true. Tylia is not only an author. She’s a radio show personality and a disability activist. Tylia has written about disability-related topics for Yahoo Life, Your Tango, The Mighty, ReadUnwritten.com, Words Between Coasts Project, Wednesday, Spilwords, and Goble Thrive. Worth Living Among her other appearances are Disability on the Spectrum and Why I was Afraid of Sexuality. Previously, Tylia was nominated to Diversabilities list of the most influential Disability Impacts of 2022. Additionally, Tylia holds the position of chairman in the creative director role for the North American Association Of Cerebral Palsy Advocates. She serves as a mentor for the Disability EmpowHer Network as well. Tylia also works for Write It Up Publishing as a sensitivity reader focusing on disability representation. Tylia has also been involved in many movie press releases for Samuel Goldwyn Films Come as you are Piece of me which was the short film directed and written by award winning filmmaker Bruna Cabral as well as the film adaptation of the book Calvin can’t fly by Jenifer Burnes Tylia is also a keynote speaker at 2020’s Cerebral Palsy Awareness conference. She has also been a guest speaker at Northeastern State University Broken Arrow where she talks to college students about disability and inclusion in education. She has also been a guest speaker at Plantation Middle School, where she discussed inclusion and disability with classmates. Tylia is fully certified in Education for All: Disability, Diversity, and Inclusion through Cape Town University. She’s also certified in Understanding Diversity and Inclusion through Purdue University. She’s also certified in creative writing at the University of East Anglia. Tylia hosts the Stomping On cerebral Palsy radio show with DJ Ty on Asheville FM with DJ Mouse during the Come On In the Kitchen segment once a month she also helps the staff behind the scenes, help bring awareness to disability awareness and inclusion within the radio broadcasting industry .
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