Why Chronic Warriors Need to Stop Apologizing

I am not sorry.

A dear friend, whom I connected with over chronic illness commonalities, could not stop saying sorry. Sorry for taking forever to respond. Sorry for this. Sorry for that.

When I validated there was nothing of annoyance, I realized I do the same. Sorry for not doing the grocery shopping. Sorry for needing to rest. Sorry for asking for help.

Lifelong chronic illness can make us feel like problem children. High maintenance adults. A burden.

But then, I remember how willing I am to help my loved ones. How much joy it brings me when I can lighten someone else’s load. Others must feel the same. I have to remind myself that I am not a burden. I am me. I am valued.

Saying sorry devalues someone’s commitment and intentions. People want to help. It brings them joy. It initiates connection and fulfills the need of emotional intimacy. We are in this together.

So I am not sorry, I am thankful.