Cat

I know a lot of us have problems with relationships. Some of us lose relationships because of fibromyalgia. I just wanted to share the story of mine to give you hope. In 2006 I went through one of the most traumatic times of my life. I thought I was happily married until a bombshell got dropped on me. I was married to the father of my three children. We had been together for eight years and suddenly it was over. My husband of eight years, father to my young children, admitted he cheated on me. During the ensuing argument, he confessed that the reason he did it was that he was tired of me being sick all the time. I was heartbroken, destroyed… I thought my life was over. Obviously, my marriage was. I begged and pleaded for him not to destroy our family. His reply to me was, “Let me see what she wants from this.” That threw me into a rage. I was no one’s second choice, so I told him to get out and threw him out. Shortly after that, I started looking for a single parent support group online. Here I was alone with an 8-year-old, a 6-year-old and a 3-year-old. I did not know what I was going to do. A support group would help me make it through it, so I searched and I searched. Each search I would pull up would show this Match.com profile of the same guy. I ignored it for days. Then after seeing it dozens of times I read it over. I could not believe it, he sounded like the perfect man. A single, recently divorced, father of two. Well, I was not interested in finding a man and went on with my search. After a couple of weeks of seeing him frequently in my searches, I investigated it more. I gave in to curiosity and signed up on Match.com. I read over his profile a dozen times, probably. Finally, I winked at him. I did not know it was deer season, so he was out of town. I did not receive a response and wasn’t too concerned about it because I wasn’t interested in jumping right into a relationship. A week or so later, he messaged me. My heart was beating in my throat. I could not be so lucky to land a guy like him. We exchanged emails for weeks, then came phone calls. Phone calls that would last into the long hours of the nights. Every night we spoke, for over a month. I fell in love with him before I ever met him. During these long calls and emails, I told him what had happened, and I told him about my health challenges. He did not care. So, we finally decided to meet. I had him come to my house to watch movies because a big ice storm had just hit. He drove through all that bad weather just to come and meet me. We went out for a second date the next day. The rest is history. We have now been married for over 13 years. He has been a wonderful husband, father to our children and loves me unconditionally. So, if you find yourself suddenly single because of your illnesses, don’t worry, I believe the right one will find their way to you. God sent me Joe, I’m sure of it, and he will send you your angel when it is time.

I know a lot of us have problems with relationships. Some of us lose relationships because of fibromyalgia. I just wanted to share the story of mine to give you hope. In 2006 I went through one of the most traumatic times of my life. I thought I was happily married until a bombshell got dropped on me. I was married to the father of my three children. We had been together for eight years and suddenly it was over. My husband of eight years, father to my young children, admitted he cheated on me. During the ensuing argument, he confessed that the reason he did it was that he was tired of me being sick all the time. I was heartbroken, destroyed… I thought my life was over. Obviously, my marriage was. I begged and pleaded for him not to destroy our family. His reply to me was, “Let me see what she wants from this.” That threw me into a rage. I was no one’s second choice, so I told him to get out and threw him out. Shortly after that, I started looking for a single parent support group online. Here I was alone with an 8-year-old, a 6-year-old and a 3-year-old. I did not know what I was going to do. A support group would help me make it through it, so I searched and I searched. Each search I would pull up would show this Match.com profile of the same guy. I ignored it for days. Then after seeing it dozens of times I read it over. I could not believe it, he sounded like the perfect man. A single, recently divorced, father of two. Well, I was not interested in finding a man and went on with my search. After a couple of weeks of seeing him frequently in my searches, I investigated it more. I gave in to curiosity and signed up on Match.com. I read over his profile a dozen times, probably. Finally, I winked at him. I did not know it was deer season, so he was out of town. I did not receive a response and wasn’t too concerned about it because I wasn’t interested in jumping right into a relationship. A week or so later, he messaged me. My heart was beating in my throat. I could not be so lucky to land a guy like him. We exchanged emails for weeks, then came phone calls. Phone calls that would last into the long hours of the nights. Every night we spoke, for over a month. I fell in love with him before I ever met him. During these long calls and emails, I told him what had happened, and I told him about my health challenges. He did not care. So, we finally decided to meet. I had him come to my house to watch movies because a big ice storm had just hit. He drove through all that bad weather just to come and meet me. We went out for a second date the next day. The rest is history. We have now been married for over 13 years. He has been a wonderful husband, father to our children and loves me unconditionally. So, if you find yourself suddenly single because of your illnesses, don’t worry, I believe the right one will find their way to you. God sent me Joe, I’m sure of it, and he will send you your angel when it is time.

Having a chronic illness such as fibromyalgia really does take its toll on you, especially when you have a ton of other stuff along with it like me. It waxes and wanes but it never goes away, at least it doesn’t for me. Right now I must say it’s as bad as it has ever been before. My pain level has driven me so far down that even my positive outlook is suffering. I am so sick of being sick. My only escape is the sleep I get but now the pain is twisting my dreams and I can’t even escape it there now. I awake so sore that it makes me want to scream out just to move. I’m as tired when I wake up as I was when I went to bed. Relief seems to be escaping me these days. Get more exercise, that’s what they say. They have no idea how hard that is to do when every movement makes you want to flinch with pain. When walking any distance at all makes your spine feel as though it’s just going to crumble apart and disintegrate. I do what I can, I walk short distances, I do leg lifts in my chair, but it’s hard. I wish others could understand how hard. Lose weight. I try, I really do. Without being able to be as active as you need to be it’s a very hard thing to do. I know my weight, which was put on after falling ill, makes it worse. It makes my self-image worse too which doesn’t help things at all. I wish I could lose it and I’m trying hard to, but it’s a slow process feeling as I do. Take your meds. I do, I promise I do, just as they tell me to do, but it isn’t helping enough. I have missed them and I was lucky not to spend the day curled up in a ball on the floor, so I know they help, but they aren’t doing enough. There has to be something out there that will help give me my life back. Depression? Sure, I struggle with depression. When there isn’t a part of your body that doesn’t hurt all of the time, you might be depressed too. I think those of us who function with this are a lot stronger than people give us credit for. I can’t even eat without experiencing symptoms. I eat something, it sends me running to the bathroom. There isn’t an aspect of living that fibromyalgia or the slew of co-existing conditions do not touch. You name it, there is an ill effect to go along with it. The symptoms feed off each other, each one causing the others to be worse. I try to stay positive. I know this will pass and I will feel better, but even then I won’t feel good. I have my good spells but even then there is still the ever-present pain, depression, stomach issues etc. Still, there are better times when I can do more and enjoy more, but what do I do in the meantime? I’m getting worn down, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I’m losing hope that there are good days ahead and that relief can be found. I mustn’t let myself get like that, I must always believe there is hope, but right now that’s hard. I must hold onto the thought that this too shall pass. I just hope it passes quickly…

I want you to know that I want to be such a better mother than I am. I hope someday you can fully understand that I have tried my best. I hope you never really understand what I feel due to my illnesses, as I would never wish you to follow in my footsteps in that way. I want to play with you but the fatigue and the pain just makes it impossible. I hope you understand that my desire to do so is there, but it’s just not always possible. Trust me, I fight it the best I can to try to do what I can with you. I may pay for it for days but I promise I will do what I can and to me it’s always worth it. Each day is such a struggle. Just to care for all you takes all that I have. I know it doesn’t seem like I do much, but I’m doing the best that I can. I hope you can understand that. It’s hard for me to ask for help. I try to do more than I should, and it takes a big toll on me. I know you’re stuck helping more than you should, and I’m sure you don’t see why you have to. Trust the fact that your help is appreciated so very much. I couldn’t do what I do without you. You’ve always been Mommy’s helpers and it makes my love for you that much greater, if that’s even possible. I feel bad that so much is put on your shoulders due to my illness, but I hope you know that I wish it wasn’t that way. My life is a struggle, day by day. Pain, Fatigue and depression makes it hard at times to be the mother I want to be. Yet, you love my anyway. That is where I draw my strength. You give me the strength to do what I do to pull myself out of it all to enjoy my life to the fullest that I can. It is all due to you that I endure all that I do and keep a smile on my face. You are my heart, and when my body fails me I know that never will. We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here . Thinkstock Image By: mactrunk

Having a chronic illness such as fibromyalgia really does take its toll on you, especially when you have a ton of other stuff along with it like me. It waxes and wanes but it never goes away, at least it doesn’t for me. Right now I must say it’s as bad as it has ever been before. My pain level has driven me so far down that even my positive outlook is suffering. I am so sick of being sick. My only escape is the sleep I get but now the pain is twisting my dreams and I can’t even escape it there now. I awake so sore that it makes me want to scream out just to move. I’m as tired when I wake up as I was when I went to bed. Relief seems to be escaping me these days. Get more exercise, that’s what they say. They have no idea how hard that is to do when every movement makes you want to flinch with pain. When walking any distance at all makes your spine feel as though it’s just going to crumble apart and disintegrate. I do what I can, I walk short distances, I do leg lifts in my chair, but it’s hard. I wish others could understand how hard. Lose weight. I try, I really do. Without being able to be as active as you need to be it’s a very hard thing to do. I know my weight, which was put on after falling ill, makes it worse. It makes my self-image worse too which doesn’t help things at all. I wish I could lose it and I’m trying hard to, but it’s a slow process feeling as I do. Take your meds. I do, I promise I do, just as they tell me to do, but it isn’t helping enough. I have missed them and I was lucky not to spend the day curled up in a ball on the floor, so I know they help, but they aren’t doing enough. There has to be something out there that will help give me my life back. Depression? Sure, I struggle with depression. When there isn’t a part of your body that doesn’t hurt all of the time, you might be depressed too. I think those of us who function with this are a lot stronger than people give us credit for. I can’t even eat without experiencing symptoms. I eat something, it sends me running to the bathroom. There isn’t an aspect of living that fibromyalgia or the slew of co-existing conditions do not touch. You name it, there is an ill effect to go along with it. The symptoms feed off each other, each one causing the others to be worse. I try to stay positive. I know this will pass and I will feel better, but even then I won’t feel good. I have my good spells but even then there is still the ever-present pain, depression, stomach issues etc. Still, there are better times when I can do more and enjoy more, but what do I do in the meantime? I’m getting worn down, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I’m losing hope that there are good days ahead and that relief can be found. I mustn’t let myself get like that, I must always believe there is hope, but right now that’s hard. I must hold onto the thought that this too shall pass. I just hope it passes quickly…

Having a chronic illness such as fibromyalgia really does take its toll on you, especially when you have a ton of other stuff along with it like me. It waxes and wanes but it never goes away, at least it doesn’t for me. Right now I must say it’s as bad as it has ever been before. My pain level has driven me so far down that even my positive outlook is suffering. I am so sick of being sick. My only escape is the sleep I get but now the pain is twisting my dreams and I can’t even escape it there now. I awake so sore that it makes me want to scream out just to move. I’m as tired when I wake up as I was when I went to bed. Relief seems to be escaping me these days. Get more exercise, that’s what they say. They have no idea how hard that is to do when every movement makes you want to flinch with pain. When walking any distance at all makes your spine feel as though it’s just going to crumble apart and disintegrate. I do what I can, I walk short distances, I do leg lifts in my chair, but it’s hard. I wish others could understand how hard. Lose weight. I try, I really do. Without being able to be as active as you need to be it’s a very hard thing to do. I know my weight, which was put on after falling ill, makes it worse. It makes my self-image worse too which doesn’t help things at all. I wish I could lose it and I’m trying hard to, but it’s a slow process feeling as I do. Take your meds. I do, I promise I do, just as they tell me to do, but it isn’t helping enough. I have missed them and I was lucky not to spend the day curled up in a ball on the floor, so I know they help, but they aren’t doing enough. There has to be something out there that will help give me my life back. Depression? Sure, I struggle with depression. When there isn’t a part of your body that doesn’t hurt all of the time, you might be depressed too. I think those of us who function with this are a lot stronger than people give us credit for. I can’t even eat without experiencing symptoms. I eat something, it sends me running to the bathroom. There isn’t an aspect of living that fibromyalgia or the slew of co-existing conditions do not touch. You name it, there is an ill effect to go along with it. The symptoms feed off each other, each one causing the others to be worse. I try to stay positive. I know this will pass and I will feel better, but even then I won’t feel good. I have my good spells but even then there is still the ever-present pain, depression, stomach issues etc. Still, there are better times when I can do more and enjoy more, but what do I do in the meantime? I’m getting worn down, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I’m losing hope that there are good days ahead and that relief can be found. I mustn’t let myself get like that, I must always believe there is hope, but right now that’s hard. I must hold onto the thought that this too shall pass. I just hope it passes quickly…

I want you to know that I want to be such a better mother than I am. I hope someday you can fully understand that I have tried my best. I hope you never really understand what I feel due to my illnesses, as I would never wish you to follow in my footsteps in that way. I want to play with you but the fatigue and the pain just makes it impossible. I hope you understand that my desire to do so is there, but it’s just not always possible. Trust me, I fight it the best I can to try to do what I can with you. I may pay for it for days but I promise I will do what I can and to me it’s always worth it. Each day is such a struggle. Just to care for all you takes all that I have. I know it doesn’t seem like I do much, but I’m doing the best that I can. I hope you can understand that. It’s hard for me to ask for help. I try to do more than I should, and it takes a big toll on me. I know you’re stuck helping more than you should, and I’m sure you don’t see why you have to. Trust the fact that your help is appreciated so very much. I couldn’t do what I do without you. You’ve always been Mommy’s helpers and it makes my love for you that much greater, if that’s even possible. I feel bad that so much is put on your shoulders due to my illness, but I hope you know that I wish it wasn’t that way. My life is a struggle, day by day. Pain, Fatigue and depression makes it hard at times to be the mother I want to be. Yet, you love my anyway. That is where I draw my strength. You give me the strength to do what I do to pull myself out of it all to enjoy my life to the fullest that I can. It is all due to you that I endure all that I do and keep a smile on my face. You are my heart, and when my body fails me I know that never will. We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here . Thinkstock Image By: mactrunk