Tbinola

It has always been extremely difficult for myself to connect with other people. If I happen to connect with someone. The process of maintaining the connection proves to be even more challenging. True connections should come natural but there is always a process in regards to gaining trust in order to fully feel comfortable in most scenarios. Reaching this level with someone takes a great deal of time and patience. Especially when having previous experiences of being hurt. However, nothing seems to ever last and it’s disheartening that in most instances, it all just slowly but surely fades away like nothing ever existed or even mattered. This seems to be a repeated cycle in my life. I have my own issues as well in shutting down and pushing people away which certainly doesn’t help the situation. However, it would be nice to have a few genuine connections in my life that actually last. Sometimes, it’s easier to just keep to myself because feeling alone is where I always end up at some point. I apologize for the ramble, just another evening of random thoughts, thanks for letting me vent.

I gave my pet away. I wasnt bad even though that’s how I felt. I was so tired.#Depression made everything much more difficult. How could I take care of my pet when I struggled taking care of me?

Giving away my baby,didn’t mean I no longer loved her. I always felt like a mother and my baby was a gift in my life.

#Depression told me I wasn’t a good mom.I couldn’t take care of her so well. I did my best but it wasn’t enough.My baby could go -hopefully- somewhere better.

I know how it looks to some people.If you give an animal away, it must mean you don’t care.

My family couldn’t understand my behaviour.

There were moments I’d ask myself why I couldn’t do better and keep her. All I knew was that I’d miss her. All I saw was how difficult everything was. From the point of waking up,to getting out of bed,to eating ,cleaning etc.

I kept holding my baby and taking more photos of her. I’d ask her to forgive me. I didn’t know if I could forgive myself. I couldn’t believe she’d be gone,I was the one giving her away. Thoughts were loud.

I’m sorry,I was whispering.

I’m thankful to my online friends who are always supportive. If you have a friend who is having a difficult time,be there for them,even in silence. You don’t have to understand everything,just love them.

Hello ,

Having a rough day.
Could you all keep me in ure prayers ??
I could really use them
Thank you 🙏🙏🙏 #Depression