Pamula Floyd

@pamula-floyd | contributor
Pamula Floyd battles depression, anxiety, fibro, and migraines. She lives with her husband, adult son, and several rescue dogs. "Mother Knows Best: A Memoir" comes out on August 10. It’s about the tragedy that happened to her son leaving him with special healthcare needs.
Pamula Floyd

Struggling With Chronic Insomnia for Much of Your Life

No one expects a high schooler to have insomnia, but it happens. I would lay in bed and look at the ceiling until almost two hours before I had to be up. I was drained. I was confused. It’s like my body was moving out of habit and not out of a real need to. Sadly, that was almost 40 years ago. Insomnia affects 33 percent to 50 percent of the adult population. Whereas I am lucky enough to have chronic insomnia, which affects 10 percent to 15 percent of the population, according to the Cleveland Clinic. What’s so bad about insomnia is how it affects your ability to do things during the day. And with me being a mom of a child with disabilities, I have to be on my ball game at all times. There are several insomnia symptoms that are particularly difficult. They are: Difficulty falling asleep at night. One can only watch so much Netflix. Irritability, depression and anxiety. I have meds for these too. It’s not fair. Difficulty paying attention. My focus and my memory are bad. I tend to do things wrong quite often. Struggling to get along with people because I am irritable and depressed. The next day I have a feeling like I haven’t slept at all. Most insomnia doctors will recommend the same tips for better sleep. They are: Avoid watching television or reading a book in bed. Use the bedroom for only sleep and sexual activity. Avoid eating large meals or drinking a lot of water in the evening. Eat a light snack before bed. Make sure the room has a comfortable temperature and is dark. And take your medication, if the doctor has prescribed you a prescription to help you sleep. I take Ambien. Though I don’t like to take it every night. And I take melatonin. If you feel like you might have insomnia, call your doctor. Sometimes a sleep test is necessary. Other times it will be a question and answer session followed by you most likely keeping a diary for a while. Insomnia is serious. So don’t take it lightly.

Community Voices

IEP vs 504 an experienced teen's perspective #MentalHealth

Hi everybody , I've had learning plans all of my life whether its an IEP or 504 , and they are very benefical. But let me explain the difference a 504 is more based on accomidations such as allowing to sit in front of class for better learning , or breaks outside the classroom etc. I had a 504 and it didn't give me as many benefits as IEP. An IEP is a plan for your kid it goes through preschool I think and College if you stil apply for it . An IEP is a plan for your kid in a time period they need to meet , my goals are like meet new healthy supportive friends , and do well in math . An IEP or 504 can be given to any kid but they have to do a lot of testing such as health, physoloical , accedmic , and social . A kid that does get the iEP or 504 will have meetings with the child's teachers , and counsolers . For me in high school its a bit different my teachers cant come to the meeting since they are teaching so they write reports about me and tell it at the meeting . Sometimes I get to attend to go to the meetings , and talk . I suggest you and your partenr go if thats possible . Any kid can get it but its hard , and parents have to fill papers in such . If your child has specail needs ,down syndrome , Autism , or for my case serve mental health then a 504 or IEP would be very benefical #iep #504plan #specialneedslearning #SpecialNeeds

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Self-indulgent Rant Time

I cannot stomach hearing "why don't you try and get out more, something just for you" any more. I cannot, cannot, cannot. This is from the one person in the world I can really talk to and let it out.

I have #Depression , yes. I could probably do with having something 'of my own', yes. It comes from a place of love, yes.

But I also have #Anxiety . I am also a #mother . A mother of three, two of whom have #Autism and attend #SpecialNeeds schools (usually, not currently due to covid). I do not work outside the home because we have no childcare. I fumble around in the gig economy while also studying because I hope that one day, one day, it will be my turn. I am intelligent... that's one strength I know I have no matter what my shitty #MentalHealth tries to tell me.

I need stimulating. My brain, at the moment, feels dead. I am barely surviving lately. My mood has taken a real dive. All people are annoying me. Every last person on the planet is annoying me. I feel like I can't breathe and move. I feel trapped and tied. I feel that while I know I am not the worst off in the world, nobody else wants to spend a second acknowledging or validating my feelings or thoughts. Which IMHO are currently running pretty deep. But instead want me to listen to them and what, to me, are very trivial in comparison.

I'm the well everyone turns to for support. All my family. What few friends I have. Literally everyone. I used to be flattered that people wanted my opinion, my insight, my support, my ear, my shoulder. I like helping people and I was proud of the compliments - "you are so open, I could talk to you for ages" but now I'm almost resentful. Nobody is there for me now when I need it. Not really. Not meaningfully.

So I'm not just depressed anymore. I'm angry too. And quite frankly... pissed.

I will be ok. I'll be back to doing everything for everyone soon and I'll find comfort in a book... probably historical, reminding me of my privilege being alive today. But right now... ugh.

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Community Voices

Can anyone weigh in? My five year old son is quite challenging. He has a disability, diagnosis.... we are planning to be at my parents house for the weekend and a neighbor asked me if my son is invited. I looked at her as though she had two heads! I said he is one of my children, he is their grandchild of course. She said “don’t take it for granted “ when I mentioned it to my mom she didn’t sound as appalled as I thought she should have, and just said well I’ll hire lots of extra cleaning help (my parents aren’t wealthy- this made me feel worse) can anyone help me out ? What’s normal? What are other people’s experience #Zebra #Behavior #Support #courage #Family #Parenting #SpecialNeeds #CowdenSyndrome

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I don’t know if I agree with her, I don’t know if I like her and I don’t know if I want to be her friend, but I’m so inspired by the story of a married religious mother of a large family including a youngest with disabilities being considered for the Supreme Court. It’s nice to see that family/career/religion are not mutually exclusive. Again I’m not commenting about her opinions or about the fellow who may nominate her

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When Water is Deafening

<p>When Water is Deafening</p>
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special needs x church community

[so yeah, duh, this will mention general brief church/religion/faith things in passing, if that's any concern]

I'm gonna share smtg I encountered in church this weekend (I was just on duty for ushering, technically not directly involved) and would like your perspective - both sides of the coin, haha.

Anyway, my church has a special needs ministry that holds fortnightly activities. Ever since on-site church resumed, one of the families has been quite enthusiastic to join us - they always would like the remaining tickets if there are any (how we currently function is, due to limited capacity, diff groups are rostered before it's open for all every Wed evening, subject to availability of remainder)

This week, they came to church again. They sat in the first 3 rows (someone booked them the wrong zone), behind the new pastor (who was due to he commissioned hehe) - not sure how relevant this all is but it was highlighted to me -- I was ushering at the ground level, never went to the sanctuary at all lol.

So anyway, abt 10mins in, I see the dad and son (son has special needs) leave and come out the stairwell door - I don't think all that much, I thought they were just taking a breather hehe. 5mins later, mom comes out and spots me, apologises that they are leaving. She tells me "I got to leave now- go home now cos my son behaviour" which .. to me sounds like a complete pity and non-reason to leave (at this point I'm just like, nah, come back after a short breather, don't need to leave, church needs to learn, etc.) But she keeps insisting "it's ok, I'm worried we might affect others, overall we felt bad & don’t feel at ease - tat's wat we care. Other ppl also very important to us. We cannot b selfish n jus think its ok"

I text my pastor (who himself has CP hehe & recently took over SN ministry) who says "You can tell her I say it's ok for them to stay.", which, try as I might, turns out to be more of a situation like, "hehe I thought so but the prob is they already left"

I empathise with how she feels, but I personally feel that her actions help no one - to improve the situation there must be understanding, to have understanding there must be interaction. If they keep leaving there is no chance for interaction and improvement and knowing each other :-(

I realise this might all be privilegey lenses but tbh, I think it's also partly her own insecurities bc it's not like anyone chased them out.

They'll think abt this week and respond by Tues/Wed.

Your thoughts?

#CheckInWithMe #Church #SpecialNeeds #Disability #CheerMeOn

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Which community should we join? Where do we belong?

<p>Which community should we join? Where do we belong?</p>
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