Sally Fowler

Last year, I had to call my health insurance company so many times I now have their number as a contact in my phone. This year seems to be continuing the trend of needing to call to discuss one thing or another far more frequently than I’d like to be calling. Frankly, I miss being a kid and being able to hand the phone off to my dad, letting it be his problem. If it isn’t calling the health insurance company, it’s negotiating with doctors’ receptionists who think they know it all when in truth they know very little about your particular case or what’s going on, or the billing department for the fifth time because a bill is still incorrect. Worse still, is calling office after office trying to find someone who will take you on as a patient. If you’re a rare patient, you’ll be making a lot of calls. And to think, people still believe others “fake” their condition or disability for the fun perks! Ha! This is not fun. These are not perks. I’d much rather call someone else than my insurance company, various doctor offices, or the billing department. Nonetheless, these calls are inevitable when you live with a chronic illness, as I do. I’ve had complex regional pain syndrome for about eight years now. In that time, I’ve made a lot of difficult and stressful calls to find answers, fix billing errors, ask for appeals on claims and more. I’ve learned a few tips to pass on for what not to do, and how to handle these calls while remaining calm, professional, and only frustrated on the inside. What not to do: Don’t swear. Don’t yell or use an aggressive tone of voice. Don’t use demeaning words, even if they don’t know what’s going on or haven’t been helpful. Don’t hang up on them. You may not be aware of this, but it is possible for a doctor’s office to “fire” you as a patient. If you are overly aggressive towards their staff, there is a very high chance of this happening to you. It does not matter if you feel justified in being upset – they have a right to not be treated like chew toys. What to do instead: Take notes. Before you place the call, grab a notepad or an empty sheet of paper if you use a medical binder. Write the date, who you are calling, and jot down what you need to talk to them about, as well as any questions you have with space underneath for the answers. As you go through the call, write down what is said. Also, write down what call number this is, so that if the problem persists you can say how many times you’ve called. Use fun colored pens for your notes. This seems silly, but it can make looking at the notepad less stressful. Smile! The person you’re talking to can’t see you smiling, but it’s hard to be terse with someone and smile at the same time. Write down their name, and clarify that you have the right name before you continue with your call. Recording the name helps you keep better records, and can help clear up future problems. Using their name while you talk to them makes them feel like they are being heard and respected. Forgetting their name, even if unintentional, makes them feel like you don’t care what’s being said. “Please” and “thank you” go along way. Even if they weren’t helpful at all, it helps to continue on with good manners. Remember that they are people too. Chances are, the person you’re talking to is not the one who screwed up. They’re probably used to getting yelled at, but that doesn’t mean you have to be one more reason they hate their job. Be polite, say thank you, keep it chill. This will likely surprise them and they’ll be more willing to help you. Also, if this is someone you’re likely to be calling again at some point, it will serve you better to be nice, no matter how angry you are. Find a frustration outlet, other than them. Doing something that allows your frustration to vent out safely can help you stay calmer while talking to them. Pace back and forth, ride an exercise bike or walk on a treadmill, play with a fidget toy, play with therapy or silly putty, stroke your pet. Something that gets the energy out, but that won’t distract you from your conversation. Only do a set number of calls in a day. If you have a lot of calls to make, you are probably going to be more worn out by the last one. A tired person with a chronic illness is a person more likely to be terse and frustrated. Break up the list and limit yourself to two to three calls instead of all five to six. Make your calls first thing. If you can, making the calls first thing accomplishes two things: You know you’re calling at a time when they are open, and you get the calls over with. If your condition is worse in the morning, wait until a time of day when it settles. Be friendly. Sometimes you may hear a representative apologize for their computer being slow. Reciprocate their frustration by making a light comment about how it’s Monday and the computer just doesn’t want to work. Or tell them that it is OK, your computer is slow too! If they ask how your day is going, answer them and ask about theirs. If you have chronic pain, get yourself in a comfortable position. If you force yourself to hold a position that triggers more pain, it will make you more stressed out, tired and less patient. I use all of these tips, and the result? These calls are still difficult, but I’m a lot better at staying professional and tactful, even when I’m furious. I take notes with fun colored pens — usually two colors, one for questions, one for answers. I smile real big even when fuming on the inside. I’ve played with therapy putty, stroked my dog, or ridden an exercise bike while making calls. I use people’s names, say please and thank you, and engage in non-related conversation. I remind myself that they are people too, doing a job where they probably get yelled at more than thanked. Sometimes I even encounter people who are just as irritated as I am that I’m not getting proper care, or that a bill is repeatedly wrong, or that I can’t get approval for a treatment that could help me. Part of chronic illness means having to call these types of businesses far more often than the average person. You’re forever in a long-term relationship with your health insurance company and countless doctor offices. It’s a good idea to cultivate a good relationship, as best you can, even when it’s hard. It’s incredibly easy to yell at the faceless voice on the phone. But easy isn’t always the best method.

We are drowning in a plethora of misinformation about service dogs and emotional support animals. Every week a new article about a fake service dog or an ESA on an airline gone wrong finds its way into the media. These stories tell one side of the story, while the truth remains invisible, working in silence, working without drawing attention, because that’s how trained dogs are supposed to behave. That’s how real teams are supposed to operate. Up until last night, I thought the worst side effects to this plague of misinformation and entitlement were the actual risks of an untrained dog hurting a person or a real working team, the unintended damage done to a pet who isn’t properly prepared for handling the stress of being in public, and the increase in frequency of real service dog teams or real ESAs being turned away from accommodations based on previous bad experiences with fakes. Last night, I realized there’s one more piece that adds to this conversation. As the ridiculousness smothers the real, the real is being lumped alongside the fake and everyone becomes a punchline. Real teams, real people who need their dogs for medical assistance are becoming jokes, and that’s not OK. The internet is a wonderful and terrible thing. It allows people to share information in the blink of an eye, and doesn’t necessarily scrutinize whether that information is true or false. As a result, there is a ton of information about service dogs and emotional support animals available online. The question then becomes, what do you believe? Who do you believe? There are people right now scamming anywhere from $60 – 100 dollars from ignorant people online by creating fake service dog registries that give out official-looking paperwork and ID cards, but don’t require any proof of training. Within minutes anyone’s dog can go from pet to service dog or pet to emotional support dog with a click of a button, or so they think. The Truth: It takes between 600 – 2000 hours to train a service dog to do its job, or about two years. Service dogs undergo extensive training to learn how to listen to their disabled handler in a wide array of situations, how to behave at home and in public, how to perform complex activities known as tasks to assist their disabled handler, and how to remain confident around all sorts of stimuli, scenarios, and environments. A person must be disabled in order to need and partner with a service dog The handlers (person with a disability) of service dogs are permitted access rights to any public space. This access permission is different from what’s given to therapy dogs or emotional support dogs. Therapy dogs are only permitted in certain public spaces and must have prior permission. Emotional support dogs are only permitted on flights, in non-pet housing, and sometimes doctor or therapist appointments. Under U.S. law, service dogs aren’t required to be registered or certified. Therapy dogs are required to be certified. Emotional support animals are not required to be registered or certified, but a doctor’s note is strongly encouraged and can be required in some situations. Service dogs have a specific function to perform. They work exclusively with a disabled person in managing that person’s medical condition. Therapy dogs are highly trained companions who offer support to strangers and assist communities in coping through difficult times. Emotional support animals/dogs are pets with very minimal rights for those who truly need the emotional comfort provided by the animal. Emotional support animals are not trained to do a specific function. They are not trained in how to be a working animal. They may help their owners, but they do so by existing, not from being rigorously trained to do so. The media perpetuates the cycle of misinformation every time they share a story about a fake ESA or fake service dog and don’t bother to provide their readers with accurate information. The media perpetuates the problem when they share stories about people who successfully parade an ESA all over town, declaring that they have the right to because they “need their dog.” They often don’t bother to research more about that person to determine the truth, and blatantly ignore the fact that owners of ESAs do not even have that kind of access permission. People are more likely to click on an article that seems outrageous and funny than one that is informative and possibly boring. There are plenty of real service dog stories circulating around, but they aren’t remembered as profoundly as the person who claimed they needed a peacock on their flight for emotional comfort or that funny scene on “Grey’s Anatomy” with a rogue ESA acting out. ​I’m not here to demean or criticize the needs of people with anxiety, depression, chronic pain, or other disorders who genuinely find solace in the presence of an emotional support animal, but don’t necessarily need the extensive level of help that comes from a service dog. Whoever you are, good for you for doing what you need to help take care of yourself. But I really hope you’re making smart decisions about how you utilize that golden ticket of “emotional support animal” and are keeping in mind the toll that being in public and being untrained will have on your pet’s own mental stability. I don’t read articles that talk about the newest outlandish animals someone is calling a service animal or an emotional support animal. They make me fume inside, which triggers stress and pain flares. Each time someone reads an article about a fake service dog, an outlandish emotional support animal, watches a show or movie that cracks jokes about people who must have their dog with them, or watches a show where people fake a dog as a service dog just to take it into a restaurant, the value of real service dog teams is being stripped away. The perception that there really are people out there who need a dog’s assistance is being eroded bit by bit. Sally getting help with sensory overload from her service dog. We Are Not Your Punchline There are thousands of real service dog teams all over the world. Right now there are thousands of dogs keeping their disabled handlers alive by helping them manage their various medical conditions. The man with epilepsy who relies on his service dog to alert to seizures before they happen so he has time to take medication or get someplace safe genuinely needs to take his dog everywhere with him. His needs are not funny or a desperate plea for attention. He is not a joke. The woman who relies on her guide dog to be her eyes, to help her navigate safely across the road without being hit or to bring her various items she needs to get through her day genuinely needs the aid of her guide dog. Her needs are not funny. She isn’t pretending to be blind so she can take her doggo everywhere. She is not a joke. I rely on my service dog to prevent pain flares before they strike, to prevent falls before they happen, and to be my hands when my body fails me. I live with a severe, perpetual nerve pain condition, called complex regional pain syndrome. I rely on my service dog to get me off the ground when my brain forgets I have legs, causing me to suddenly collapse. I rely on my service dog to pick up items I drop so an intense migraine or muscle spasms that could dislocate my jaw aren’t triggered when I try to bend over. I rely on my service dog to help me do simple activities like going for walks, doing laundry, bringing firewood into the house and more because without his help I would be bedridden. I know that for a fact, because before I had his help, I was bedridden. I was ensconced in chains that prevented me from living a half-way normal life; chains of unrelenting nerve pain. The pain is still there, but the chains weighing me down are gone. My service dog lifted those. I need my service dog to go everywhere with me because without his assistance, I could fall and be stuck on the ground unable to move. I wouldn’t be able to go up stairs in public buildings. I wouldn’t be able to open public doors. I wouldn’t be able to stand up after sitting for more than 20 minutes. I would be constantly getting bombarded with pain flare after pain flare until the chains wrapped around me again and forced me down once more. My needs are not a joke. My disability is not a joke. My service dog and his job are not a joke. I am not a joke. Sally’s service dog helps load the washing machine. Last night, I had the “privilege” of being in a room full of people who know I have a real service dog. They were making jokes at my expense because they think it is so preposterous to have to take your dog everywhere. They were even thinking of doing it themselves so they could take their dog everywhere too. Within moments, a family gathering that I was able to attend because of my service dog’s assistance turned from decent to sour. I became the punchline to a very cruel joke based in misinformation, lack of education, ignorance and a little bit of heartlessness. Some people think it’s laughable, the idea that someone would need to take a dog everywhere with them, and even that it sounds like fun. They don’t get that for many disabled people, it isn’t an option. It’s work with an assistance dog, go everywhere with your dog, or have no shot at life. Needing a service dog means your whole life is forever altered. They don’t get that one day it could very well be them who is disabled, or they could have a loved one who needs a service dog, because disability doesn’t discriminate. They don’t get that it means opening yourself up to harassment and interrogation from complete strangers demanding to know your medical history or your dog’s name. They don’t get that it means having a medical condition that likely involves being in horrible pain or living with limitations and restrictions that threaten to overwhelm you and all your dreams. They don’t get that lately it sometimes means being the butt of a joke. Real service dogs are lifelines. Real service dogs are literally helping to give disabled people like me a chance at a full life. They are lifting the chains that would otherwise force many disabled people to remain shut-ins. They are not a joke.

We are drowning in a plethora of misinformation about service dogs and emotional support animals. Every week a new article about a fake service dog or an ESA on an airline gone wrong finds its way into the media. These stories tell one side of the story, while the truth remains invisible, working in silence, working without drawing attention, because that’s how trained dogs are supposed to behave. That’s how real teams are supposed to operate. Up until last night, I thought the worst side effects to this plague of misinformation and entitlement were the actual risks of an untrained dog hurting a person or a real working team, the unintended damage done to a pet who isn’t properly prepared for handling the stress of being in public, and the increase in frequency of real service dog teams or real ESAs being turned away from accommodations based on previous bad experiences with fakes. Last night, I realized there’s one more piece that adds to this conversation. As the ridiculousness smothers the real, the real is being lumped alongside the fake and everyone becomes a punchline. Real teams, real people who need their dogs for medical assistance are becoming jokes, and that’s not OK. The internet is a wonderful and terrible thing. It allows people to share information in the blink of an eye, and doesn’t necessarily scrutinize whether that information is true or false. As a result, there is a ton of information about service dogs and emotional support animals available online. The question then becomes, what do you believe? Who do you believe? There are people right now scamming anywhere from $60 – 100 dollars from ignorant people online by creating fake service dog registries that give out official-looking paperwork and ID cards, but don’t require any proof of training. Within minutes anyone’s dog can go from pet to service dog or pet to emotional support dog with a click of a button, or so they think. The Truth: It takes between 600 – 2000 hours to train a service dog to do its job, or about two years. Service dogs undergo extensive training to learn how to listen to their disabled handler in a wide array of situations, how to behave at home and in public, how to perform complex activities known as tasks to assist their disabled handler, and how to remain confident around all sorts of stimuli, scenarios, and environments. A person must be disabled in order to need and partner with a service dog The handlers (person with a disability) of service dogs are permitted access rights to any public space. This access permission is different from what’s given to therapy dogs or emotional support dogs. Therapy dogs are only permitted in certain public spaces and must have prior permission. Emotional support dogs are only permitted on flights, in non-pet housing, and sometimes doctor or therapist appointments. Under U.S. law, service dogs aren’t required to be registered or certified. Therapy dogs are required to be certified. Emotional support animals are not required to be registered or certified, but a doctor’s note is strongly encouraged and can be required in some situations. Service dogs have a specific function to perform. They work exclusively with a disabled person in managing that person’s medical condition. Therapy dogs are highly trained companions who offer support to strangers and assist communities in coping through difficult times. Emotional support animals/dogs are pets with very minimal rights for those who truly need the emotional comfort provided by the animal. Emotional support animals are not trained to do a specific function. They are not trained in how to be a working animal. They may help their owners, but they do so by existing, not from being rigorously trained to do so. The media perpetuates the cycle of misinformation every time they share a story about a fake ESA or fake service dog and don’t bother to provide their readers with accurate information. The media perpetuates the problem when they share stories about people who successfully parade an ESA all over town, declaring that they have the right to because they “need their dog.” They often don’t bother to research more about that person to determine the truth, and blatantly ignore the fact that owners of ESAs do not even have that kind of access permission. People are more likely to click on an article that seems outrageous and funny than one that is informative and possibly boring. There are plenty of real service dog stories circulating around, but they aren’t remembered as profoundly as the person who claimed they needed a peacock on their flight for emotional comfort or that funny scene on “Grey’s Anatomy” with a rogue ESA acting out. ​I’m not here to demean or criticize the needs of people with anxiety, depression, chronic pain, or other disorders who genuinely find solace in the presence of an emotional support animal, but don’t necessarily need the extensive level of help that comes from a service dog. Whoever you are, good for you for doing what you need to help take care of yourself. But I really hope you’re making smart decisions about how you utilize that golden ticket of “emotional support animal” and are keeping in mind the toll that being in public and being untrained will have on your pet’s own mental stability. I don’t read articles that talk about the newest outlandish animals someone is calling a service animal or an emotional support animal. They make me fume inside, which triggers stress and pain flares. Each time someone reads an article about a fake service dog, an outlandish emotional support animal, watches a show or movie that cracks jokes about people who must have their dog with them, or watches a show where people fake a dog as a service dog just to take it into a restaurant, the value of real service dog teams is being stripped away. The perception that there really are people out there who need a dog’s assistance is being eroded bit by bit. Sally getting help with sensory overload from her service dog. We Are Not Your Punchline There are thousands of real service dog teams all over the world. Right now there are thousands of dogs keeping their disabled handlers alive by helping them manage their various medical conditions. The man with epilepsy who relies on his service dog to alert to seizures before they happen so he has time to take medication or get someplace safe genuinely needs to take his dog everywhere with him. His needs are not funny or a desperate plea for attention. He is not a joke. The woman who relies on her guide dog to be her eyes, to help her navigate safely across the road without being hit or to bring her various items she needs to get through her day genuinely needs the aid of her guide dog. Her needs are not funny. She isn’t pretending to be blind so she can take her doggo everywhere. She is not a joke. I rely on my service dog to prevent pain flares before they strike, to prevent falls before they happen, and to be my hands when my body fails me. I live with a severe, perpetual nerve pain condition, called complex regional pain syndrome. I rely on my service dog to get me off the ground when my brain forgets I have legs, causing me to suddenly collapse. I rely on my service dog to pick up items I drop so an intense migraine or muscle spasms that could dislocate my jaw aren’t triggered when I try to bend over. I rely on my service dog to help me do simple activities like going for walks, doing laundry, bringing firewood into the house and more because without his help I would be bedridden. I know that for a fact, because before I had his help, I was bedridden. I was ensconced in chains that prevented me from living a half-way normal life; chains of unrelenting nerve pain. The pain is still there, but the chains weighing me down are gone. My service dog lifted those. I need my service dog to go everywhere with me because without his assistance, I could fall and be stuck on the ground unable to move. I wouldn’t be able to go up stairs in public buildings. I wouldn’t be able to open public doors. I wouldn’t be able to stand up after sitting for more than 20 minutes. I would be constantly getting bombarded with pain flare after pain flare until the chains wrapped around me again and forced me down once more. My needs are not a joke. My disability is not a joke. My service dog and his job are not a joke. I am not a joke. Sally’s service dog helps load the washing machine. Last night, I had the “privilege” of being in a room full of people who know I have a real service dog. They were making jokes at my expense because they think it is so preposterous to have to take your dog everywhere. They were even thinking of doing it themselves so they could take their dog everywhere too. Within moments, a family gathering that I was able to attend because of my service dog’s assistance turned from decent to sour. I became the punchline to a very cruel joke based in misinformation, lack of education, ignorance and a little bit of heartlessness. Some people think it’s laughable, the idea that someone would need to take a dog everywhere with them, and even that it sounds like fun. They don’t get that for many disabled people, it isn’t an option. It’s work with an assistance dog, go everywhere with your dog, or have no shot at life. Needing a service dog means your whole life is forever altered. They don’t get that one day it could very well be them who is disabled, or they could have a loved one who needs a service dog, because disability doesn’t discriminate. They don’t get that it means opening yourself up to harassment and interrogation from complete strangers demanding to know your medical history or your dog’s name. They don’t get that it means having a medical condition that likely involves being in horrible pain or living with limitations and restrictions that threaten to overwhelm you and all your dreams. They don’t get that lately it sometimes means being the butt of a joke. Real service dogs are lifelines. Real service dogs are literally helping to give disabled people like me a chance at a full life. They are lifting the chains that would otherwise force many disabled people to remain shut-ins. They are not a joke.

We are drowning in a plethora of misinformation about service dogs and emotional support animals. Every week a new article about a fake service dog or an ESA on an airline gone wrong finds its way into the media. These stories tell one side of the story, while the truth remains invisible, working in silence, working without drawing attention, because that’s how trained dogs are supposed to behave. That’s how real teams are supposed to operate. Up until last night, I thought the worst side effects to this plague of misinformation and entitlement were the actual risks of an untrained dog hurting a person or a real working team, the unintended damage done to a pet who isn’t properly prepared for handling the stress of being in public, and the increase in frequency of real service dog teams or real ESAs being turned away from accommodations based on previous bad experiences with fakes. Last night, I realized there’s one more piece that adds to this conversation. As the ridiculousness smothers the real, the real is being lumped alongside the fake and everyone becomes a punchline. Real teams, real people who need their dogs for medical assistance are becoming jokes, and that’s not OK. The internet is a wonderful and terrible thing. It allows people to share information in the blink of an eye, and doesn’t necessarily scrutinize whether that information is true or false. As a result, there is a ton of information about service dogs and emotional support animals available online. The question then becomes, what do you believe? Who do you believe? There are people right now scamming anywhere from $60 – 100 dollars from ignorant people online by creating fake service dog registries that give out official-looking paperwork and ID cards, but don’t require any proof of training. Within minutes anyone’s dog can go from pet to service dog or pet to emotional support dog with a click of a button, or so they think. The Truth: It takes between 600 – 2000 hours to train a service dog to do its job, or about two years. Service dogs undergo extensive training to learn how to listen to their disabled handler in a wide array of situations, how to behave at home and in public, how to perform complex activities known as tasks to assist their disabled handler, and how to remain confident around all sorts of stimuli, scenarios, and environments. A person must be disabled in order to need and partner with a service dog The handlers (person with a disability) of service dogs are permitted access rights to any public space. This access permission is different from what’s given to therapy dogs or emotional support dogs. Therapy dogs are only permitted in certain public spaces and must have prior permission. Emotional support dogs are only permitted on flights, in non-pet housing, and sometimes doctor or therapist appointments. Under U.S. law, service dogs aren’t required to be registered or certified. Therapy dogs are required to be certified. Emotional support animals are not required to be registered or certified, but a doctor’s note is strongly encouraged and can be required in some situations. Service dogs have a specific function to perform. They work exclusively with a disabled person in managing that person’s medical condition. Therapy dogs are highly trained companions who offer support to strangers and assist communities in coping through difficult times. Emotional support animals/dogs are pets with very minimal rights for those who truly need the emotional comfort provided by the animal. Emotional support animals are not trained to do a specific function. They are not trained in how to be a working animal. They may help their owners, but they do so by existing, not from being rigorously trained to do so. The media perpetuates the cycle of misinformation every time they share a story about a fake ESA or fake service dog and don’t bother to provide their readers with accurate information. The media perpetuates the problem when they share stories about people who successfully parade an ESA all over town, declaring that they have the right to because they “need their dog.” They often don’t bother to research more about that person to determine the truth, and blatantly ignore the fact that owners of ESAs do not even have that kind of access permission. People are more likely to click on an article that seems outrageous and funny than one that is informative and possibly boring. There are plenty of real service dog stories circulating around, but they aren’t remembered as profoundly as the person who claimed they needed a peacock on their flight for emotional comfort or that funny scene on “Grey’s Anatomy” with a rogue ESA acting out. ​I’m not here to demean or criticize the needs of people with anxiety, depression, chronic pain, or other disorders who genuinely find solace in the presence of an emotional support animal, but don’t necessarily need the extensive level of help that comes from a service dog. Whoever you are, good for you for doing what you need to help take care of yourself. But I really hope you’re making smart decisions about how you utilize that golden ticket of “emotional support animal” and are keeping in mind the toll that being in public and being untrained will have on your pet’s own mental stability. I don’t read articles that talk about the newest outlandish animals someone is calling a service animal or an emotional support animal. They make me fume inside, which triggers stress and pain flares. Each time someone reads an article about a fake service dog, an outlandish emotional support animal, watches a show or movie that cracks jokes about people who must have their dog with them, or watches a show where people fake a dog as a service dog just to take it into a restaurant, the value of real service dog teams is being stripped away. The perception that there really are people out there who need a dog’s assistance is being eroded bit by bit. Sally getting help with sensory overload from her service dog. We Are Not Your Punchline There are thousands of real service dog teams all over the world. Right now there are thousands of dogs keeping their disabled handlers alive by helping them manage their various medical conditions. The man with epilepsy who relies on his service dog to alert to seizures before they happen so he has time to take medication or get someplace safe genuinely needs to take his dog everywhere with him. His needs are not funny or a desperate plea for attention. He is not a joke. The woman who relies on her guide dog to be her eyes, to help her navigate safely across the road without being hit or to bring her various items she needs to get through her day genuinely needs the aid of her guide dog. Her needs are not funny. She isn’t pretending to be blind so she can take her doggo everywhere. She is not a joke. I rely on my service dog to prevent pain flares before they strike, to prevent falls before they happen, and to be my hands when my body fails me. I live with a severe, perpetual nerve pain condition, called complex regional pain syndrome. I rely on my service dog to get me off the ground when my brain forgets I have legs, causing me to suddenly collapse. I rely on my service dog to pick up items I drop so an intense migraine or muscle spasms that could dislocate my jaw aren’t triggered when I try to bend over. I rely on my service dog to help me do simple activities like going for walks, doing laundry, bringing firewood into the house and more because without his help I would be bedridden. I know that for a fact, because before I had his help, I was bedridden. I was ensconced in chains that prevented me from living a half-way normal life; chains of unrelenting nerve pain. The pain is still there, but the chains weighing me down are gone. My service dog lifted those. I need my service dog to go everywhere with me because without his assistance, I could fall and be stuck on the ground unable to move. I wouldn’t be able to go up stairs in public buildings. I wouldn’t be able to open public doors. I wouldn’t be able to stand up after sitting for more than 20 minutes. I would be constantly getting bombarded with pain flare after pain flare until the chains wrapped around me again and forced me down once more. My needs are not a joke. My disability is not a joke. My service dog and his job are not a joke. I am not a joke. Sally’s service dog helps load the washing machine. Last night, I had the “privilege” of being in a room full of people who know I have a real service dog. They were making jokes at my expense because they think it is so preposterous to have to take your dog everywhere. They were even thinking of doing it themselves so they could take their dog everywhere too. Within moments, a family gathering that I was able to attend because of my service dog’s assistance turned from decent to sour. I became the punchline to a very cruel joke based in misinformation, lack of education, ignorance and a little bit of heartlessness. Some people think it’s laughable, the idea that someone would need to take a dog everywhere with them, and even that it sounds like fun. They don’t get that for many disabled people, it isn’t an option. It’s work with an assistance dog, go everywhere with your dog, or have no shot at life. Needing a service dog means your whole life is forever altered. They don’t get that one day it could very well be them who is disabled, or they could have a loved one who needs a service dog, because disability doesn’t discriminate. They don’t get that it means opening yourself up to harassment and interrogation from complete strangers demanding to know your medical history or your dog’s name. They don’t get that it means having a medical condition that likely involves being in horrible pain or living with limitations and restrictions that threaten to overwhelm you and all your dreams. They don’t get that lately it sometimes means being the butt of a joke. Real service dogs are lifelines. Real service dogs are literally helping to give disabled people like me a chance at a full life. They are lifting the chains that would otherwise force many disabled people to remain shut-ins. They are not a joke.