Senia Bklyn

@seniabklyn
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Am I too sensitive?

I say something and he gets mad. The he responds by saying " Why do you have to go and say something so stupid?" He does this often. I run to my room and close the door. He knows I'm hiding from him again but he does nothing because it's "my fault" for getting upset. Is it?

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Ptsd

When the 4th of July comes around. My body is on defense 😩 and i really wish it wasn't.. All due to the trauma that was caused every 4th of July.. For the past 13 years.. I really dont remember a holiday that was ever celebrated and turned out great!! And every holiday I wished it would've been GREAT!! No Matter what I did to try Do make it GREAT!! By the End of The Night!! I was always in tears.. Wondering Where I went wrong 🤔
But to understand Now that None of it Was My fault .. It Just Makes Me sad!! Because holidays are supposed to be fun and spent with your loved ones.. Yet I sit alone 😔 with all these feelings and Ptsd.. Why me!!

2 people are talking about this
Community Voices

Ptsd

When the 4th of July comes around. My body is on defense 😩 and i really wish it wasn't.. All due to the trauma that was caused every 4th of July.. For the past 13 years.. I really dont remember a holiday that was ever celebrated and turned out great!! And every holiday I wished it would've been GREAT!! No Matter what I did to try Do make it GREAT!! By the End of The Night!! I was always in tears.. Wondering Where I went wrong 🤔
But to understand Now that None of it Was My fault .. It Just Makes Me sad!! Because holidays are supposed to be fun and spent with your loved ones.. Yet I sit alone 😔 with all these feelings and Ptsd.. Why me!!

2 people are talking about this
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Survivor

<p>Survivor</p>
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Hard

Today has especially hard for me to handle, I have tried to stay positive I have but with reality of every new memory I begin to doubt how the hell can I live with all this it's tearing me apart. I'm scared to sleep and that sucks I feel disgusting after every new memory I do. I also wonder why things have to happen to me I've been working so hard. I learned real quick recently don't trust. I'm not sure what is next for me I'm not I want to be better but I cannot continue on like this I can't idk I am trying to not give up but will not make any promises I'm sorry

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Yesterday

#surving abuse yesterday I wrote that I didn't know how I survived today still not sure but I learned a little from listening to others on here that I'm not so alone. I get why people have slowly backed away from me I do especially my husband he doesn't know what to do if he can't fix everything sad thing is I don't need him to fix anything all I really need is him to be there love me and never to give up on me. Anyways I have really been working hard through therapy to me making tons of progress too. Unfortunately about 4 months ago I was raped why I didn't tell anyone still confuses the hell out of me but recently I told my therapist of what happened to me now life and sleep seem harder than ever before wish I would have never said anything.

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My apologies

1st I want to apologize to all my members for not being on here for about 3 months maybe longer I was going through all my own personal situations but I'm healing I'm back and I'm here for you guys I need it to get stronger to be able to help others my cup was running empty so so I had to refill it

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Some thoughts from today

I grew up in a very chaotic and dysfunctional home. I'm also learning to accept that yes my dad abused me as a child for years. For years he covered it up with the phrase "It's just discipline." I believed him for years. Until I moved out of home this past year. But my question here is when does discipline become abuse? I'm trying to figure out a lot right now and I could use some help separating discipline and abuse. One day I want to have children but I don't want to raise them with the same trauma.

When does discipline become abuse?

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Your Not Alone

<p>Your Not Alone</p>
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