The 20 Things I've Learned (So Far) on My Autism Parenting Journey


I barely remember the person I was before my son began to lead me on this journey. The lessons he’s taught me are infinite. I’m grateful for them.

There are no ribbons handed out. There are no ceremonies or hunks of parchment to hang on the wall. But after a decade of special needs parenting, I feel I’ve earned an advanced degree in what’s important in life. Some are large, some are silly, but here are the top 20 lessons I’ve learned (so far) on this autism parenting roller coaster.

1. You’re never as good as your best day or as bad as your worst.

2. Our biggest victories often follow short bursts of brutal tests of will.

3. Comparison is a vile, ugly monster.

4. My son is sneaky like a ninja and never far away.

5. It’s possible the people who know you best are thousands of miles away, and you’ve never met them.

6. I believe God has a sense of humor.

7. That plan you had don’t mean sh*@.

8. The sweetest sentence ever uttered: “Daddy, lay with me.”

9. Bacon, ketchup and a toasted hamburger bun is a perfectly acceptable meal at Chili’s.

10. If you get a server who approves this meal without judgement, tip him or her well.

11. Facebook can be your best friend or a bitter enemy.

12. You can’t do this alone. Ask for help.

13. Finding a babysitter you can trust enough to actually relax over dinner is like finding a gold brick.

14. Your kids are always listening. Trust me.

15. If he’s quiet, he’s either sleeping or pooping. And he never sleeps.

16. The human body can do amazing things on very little sleep.

17. When in doubt about what’s bothering him, start with sensory.

18. People are drawn toward positivity. But if you fake it, they know.

19. Puberty is a bit*@.

20. There is a bigger plan.

Father and son in a parking lot. Both are holding a toy.

A version of this post originally appeared on Bacon and Juice Boxes.

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