When people learn I’m legally blind, assumptions are made — for example, that I’m completely/totally blind, which I’m not. Then I have to explain the situation to a complete stranger in the line at Starbucks or something like that. So here are the seven most awkward situations I can recall:
1. “What does she want?”
Oh, this question. It has been asked to my grandma, friends, boyfriends, everyone. Picture this: I’m sitting in a casual restaurant, glancing over the menu. I’m holding it probably less than three inches from my face. The waiter/waitress walks over to my table and looks at me pityingly. Then, they look over to whoever I’m currently dining with and asks, “What does she want?” as if I cannot speak. Then my grandma responds with the grand ol’, “I don’t know, why don’t you ask her?” and I have to reply with “Oh, sorry. I have a vision problem, but I can order for myself. Oh, and I’d like the filet mignon, please.”
2. “Do you know sign language?”
A boy from my school bus asked me this. “Did you mean Braille? In that case, no. I can read print if it’s large enough,” I reply. At this point, I receive the most confused look ever. “But I thought you were blind.” I spend the next five minutes explaining that I am not blind, but I have a visual impairment. This means I can see. I also had to explain the difference between sign language and Braille to him.
3. “Betcha don’t know how many fingers I’m holding up!”
I hate this question, and you would never believe how many times it’s been asked to me. I was just minding my own business, using my video magnifier to enlarge my notes in an American Lit class, when a fellow classmate walks over. Oh gosh, it’s the class clown. Keep walking, keep walking, I think. But nope, he stops right in front of my desk, sneers and holds two fingers so close to my face, I could tell you what he ate for lunch two days beforehand. “Betcha don’t know how many fingers I’m holding up!” When everyone starts staring, he felt the need to say, “Well, she’s blind so…” Then I had to explain once again that I’m not blind, and that he was in fact holding up two fingers.
4. “Here, _______. Do this for her.”
I’m right here, and I can hear everything you’re saying. Maybe instead of asking my friend to fill out a paper for me or cut something out for a project, quietly ask me if I am able to see well enough to complete the task myself. I’ll usually say yes. However, if I don’t say yes, I’ll politely ask you for help. Then, it is completely acceptable to get a friend or someone else I trust to assist me. Or you can ask how you could make the task easier for me. I could always give a suggestion. I like to be independent, and it really hurts my feelings when people make the assumption that I cannot do things for myself. Also, it’s quite embarrassing when you ask a random person to do something for me. Therefore, just ask me. I don’t bite most of the time!
5. “Stop, you’ll hurt yourself!”
I have a visual impairment (which is a disability), but I don’t recall taping a “fragile: please handle with care” sticker to my forehead. I will not break, I promise. I am comfortable with my abilities, or lack thereof, and I know my limits better than anyone else. Accidents can happen to anyone, including me. But please don’t make a mountain out of a molehill regarding my visual impairment.
6. “If you hold that phone so close, you’re gonna go blind!”
I was in the line at Starbucks, glancing over the menu on my phone so I could be fully prepared when the barista asked for my order (darn you, social anxiety). The woman behind me snickers. I turned around, hoping to see something pretty funny, but she was looking my way. I turned back behind me, completely confused. She then said, “If you hold that phone so close, you’re gonna go blind!” Then she went back to looking at the pastries, as if nothing happened. I didn’t want to say anything, but something in me began talking anyway. “I have a problem seeing things far away, so I do hold my phone a bit closer. Sorry if it’s bothering you.” Then we had to stand in line silently for the next three minutes until I could order my Grande White Chocolate Mocha Frappuccino and leave. Can we say awkward?
7. “I’m pretty sure that’s $10.”
This was possibly the most uncomfortable situation ever when it happened, but it’s funny to me now. I walked into the Dollar Store to buy a birthday card for my cousin, and I was just getting ready to pay when the cashier saw me having a hard time with my money, struggling to read the numbers on the bills. I finally handed him a $20 bill. I waited for my $17 and change back when he hands me $7 instead. “Excuse me, but I gave you a 20.” He looks absolutely disgusted. “I’m pretty sure that’s $10,” he says. I had no idea what to say.
Thank goodness a lady I knew from church was behind me in line. She proceeded to tell him how rude it was to take advantage of someone who couldn’t see. She literally made me cry, right there in the checkout line, because I was so happy someone had stuck up for me.
As you can see, many misconceptions and generalizations are made about someone with a visual impairment — or any disability for that matter. However, I believe you have to make the best of the bad situations and see the humor in it. The moral of this story is: (a) things aren’t always as they seem, and (b) don’t buy birthday cards from the Dollar Store.
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