To My Boyfriend, Whose Love Doesn't See a Disability
As someone with a physical disability, I have always thought I would never find someone who would see past my challenges. I especially thought I would never find someone who would love me. That all changed when I met you.
I have been in relationships, but they never lasted more than a couple of months. The boys couldn’t see past my disability. They got sick of helping me. I always felt like having someone help me was a “burden” on them, and my ex-boyfriends confirmed my feelings. I ended up not trusting guys, until you came along.
We met at work almost three years ago. We were both in relationships at the time, but instantly became friends. I thought you were cute the first day I met you. You made going to work fun. You always knew how to make me laugh, even if it involved scaring me or giving me a wet hug after you were outside, in the pouring rain, collecting carts. Little did I know you would be the best thing that has ever happened to me.
A Facebook post I made changed both of our lives. I posted that I was done dating. I was giving up on dating because I was sick and tired of talking to and going on dates with guys who would instantly ignore me when they found out I had muscular dystrophy. They next day, you asked me out, and to be honest, it threw me off.
Thank you for not questioning why I would probably need help getting into your car when I told you on our first date. I also want to thank you for not thinking twice about helping me with the little steps to get into my house. When you didn’t question why I needed help, I started to relax and slowly let you break down my wall that I’ve built for the past 20 years.
Two months later, it came time for me to tell you I had muscular dystrophy. I was so nervous. I didn’t know what your reaction would be. It got to the point where I didn’t want to tell you. When you said my disability “wouldn’t be a good reason for me to leave you. I wouldn’t be able to. I love you too much,” I fell for you even harder. That comment instantly broke down my wall and I knew I did deserve to be loved.
You made me realize I was the one stopping myself from finding love because of my instant thought that I shouldn’t be in a relationship just because I have a disability. You taught me love doesn’t see a disability.
Thank you for helping me get into your house. Thank you for driving me to and from different places; I promise, I’m working on getting my driver’s license. Thank you for not complaining about helping me. Most importantly, thank you for loving me and seeing past my disability. Thank you for coming into my life and changing it for good. I love you to the moon and back.
The Mighty is asking the following: What do you want your past, current or future partner to know about being with someone with your disability, disease or mental illness? If you’d like to participate, please send a blog post to [email protected] Please include a photo for the piece, a photo of yourself and 1-2 sentence bio. Check out our Submit a Story page for more about our submission guidelines.