To the OBGYN Who Prescribed Tea Instead of My Anxiety Medication

Editor’s note: Deciding whether or not to take medication while pregnant can be a difficult choice that does involve some risk. Consult your doctor to find out what is right for you. For more information, click here.

Dear Doctor,

You probably don’t remember me. You see hundreds of faces each day, most of them glowing with excitement, awaiting the day their beautiful baby comes into the world.

You probably don’t even remember when I called you. I really needed you to fill my anxiety medication. I had gone without it for five days. You didn’t get the message I placed on Friday after the pharmacy called me to say I needed a new order.

You probably don’t remember I had not heard from you by the following Tuesday. I called your office again and again and then once more. Crying on the couch, crying in the car, crying in the shower, unable to control the crippling fear and eight months pregnant.

You probably don’t even remember what you said to me. “You don’t need any medication. You are fine. Do some yoga. Drink some tea. Do right by your baby.” You then told me to feel better and hung up the phone.

You probably didn’t know you had set me off into a tizzy about how I would care for my daughter. It was one month until her arrival, and I was worried I had harmed her and started crying more. What kind of terrible mother take pills while pregnant?

You probably didn’t know I called back after you, so rudely, told me I didn’t need my anxiety medication. I spoke to a co-worker of yours, who did believe I was in a better place with my medication and helped me through what felt like a crisis.

You probably don’t know I delivered my daughter, beautiful and perfect, while taking my anxiety medication. I’m still a good mother. I’m sorry you did not believe I needed to feel better, like I was still a person — and not just a host for this baby.

I forgive you, but I will not forget. Plus, I don’t even like tea.

Denise McLaughlin

The Mighty is asking the following: Describe a moment when you were at a hospital and a medical staffer, fellow patient or a stranger made a negative or surprising comment that caught you off guard. How did you respond to it? Check out our Submit a Story page for more about our submission guidelines.

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