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When People Say There Are Others Who 'Have It Worse'

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“You should be grateful it isn’t worse.”

“You’re not the worst off.”

“There are people out there who feel worse/are experiencing worse/going through worse than you.”

“You don’t have anything to be down about.”

I hate these phrases.

You don’t have to be grateful for things not being any worse than they currently are. You are entitled to feel the way you do (depressed, frustrated, ill, etc.), and you are entitled to feel down about that.

If we all went along with this idea of “there are people who have it worse than you,” then logic suggests there is only one person on this whole planet who is entitled to feel rubbish about their situation. There is only one person who doesn’t have anyone else stealing the “worse off” crown from them. What sense does that make?

That one person is not the only one who is allowed to be unhappy with their lot in life.

We need to stop comparing each others’ “crap times,” feeling the need to tell people they shouldn’t feel upset, frustrated or annoyed with their current situation.

If things are bad for you right now, they are bad for you, whether other people agree or not. There is no hierarchy to feeling depressed, no hierarchy to trauma, no hierarchy to feeling fed up with things or to going through a bad patch in life. There is no ranking for everyone’s individual situations and circumstances, or for which are “better” or “worse.” Why do people feel the need to tell someone whether they’re entitled to feel a certain way, or to compare their own or another person’s situation to it?

All cases of depression, difficult situations, trauma, illnesses, etc. are all valid, and they all can be difficult for that individual. They’re all relevant.

Stop comparing.

Image via Thinkstock.

Follow this journey on The Invisible Hypothyroidism.

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Originally published: November 4, 2016
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