5 Ways to Show Your Love for Someone With Depression


Some days are hard. Some are harder than others. There are days when we need you to be there, and like any illness there are some productive and counterproductive things you can do. For the days when we need a little bit more help, here are five ways you can let us know you love us.

1. Don’t make me prove how sad I am.

I’m doing the best I can. I should never have to prove to you I am hurting. Please trust me, I am.

2. Don’t make me do things I don’t want to.

Depression and anxiety give a discomfort level that many people don’t have. When I tell you that I can’t do something, please don’t make me. Some days even getting out of bed is enough. Don’t push me.

3. Be there when I need you but not when I don’t.

Sometimes all I want is a hug. Sometimes I want to be alone. Both are OK. Just let me do what I need to do.

4. Realize I didn’t choose this.

No one would choose to be miserable every single day, so please don’t think I’m acting out for attention or that I’m faking. Honestly, many people with depression hide most of how they feel, so when we open up it’s a big deal.

5. Be proud of how far I have come.

It’s not easy, but every day we learn how to cope a little bit more. Be proud of that and how hard we work to be better friends, siblings, and children for you.

WATCH BELOW: A Day in the Life With Depression

Thinkstock photo via VR_Studio


Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.


Related to Depression

Close up on a man with crossed fingers.

I'm Sorry for the Lies I Tell You When I'm Depressed

  Living with mental illness has made me a great liar. I am able to lie, with a straight face, to anyone from those closest to me to a random stranger. I can’t speak for anyone else, but I doubt I am the only person who feels this way. Because mental illness is so misunderstood, [...]
Watercolor painting of a girl sleeping

When Depression Forces You to Become a Good Actress

Depression feels like my whole body is so heavy that it’s too much work to move it. Like everything I do is out of obligation. I smile because I’m supposed to. I talk and joke around in an attempt to seem “normal.” Depression makes me a good actress. I do what I’m supposed to do [...]
black wallpaper

The Texture of Depression

What does depression feel like? I am learning about mindfulness and meditation, and I found an exercise that asks this question. I decided to try it. I slowed down, focused on my breath and pictured myself in a vast room, all alone, with a lit candle at the center. I ask into the room, “What does my [...]
woman wearing rainboots

Sunny Days Are Hard to Come by When You Live With Depression

I strap on my shoes, feeling a little sick. My head aches; it feels like it’s full of cotton, that way it does when you have a cold. I’ve had the sniffles. I feel sick. There’s a wad of duct tape at the base of my right shoe where I had wrapped it around the [...]