When Someone Told Me I'm Using My Mental Illness as an Excuse


Someone said to me once, “Don’t use you’re illness as an excuse.” I thought to myself, “Are you really saying that to me? Are you serious?” I had never heard that before, and I was stunned.

Let’s be clear, shall we?

My brain is sick. My actions, behaviors and decisions are made from a cloudy mind, a mind on a ton of meds for bipolar disorder, anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and you think I’m using it as an excuse?

If my liver was sick, would you expect it to perform its duty as well as one that was not sick? If I needed medication to have my liver work better, would you tell me I didn’t need it? That all I had to do was change my thoughts, talk nice to it…

I’m not on holiday. I work tirelessly to improve myself, to improve my thoughts, but that doesn’t make my brain magically fix itself. Do you know what will help my brain heal? Love, compassion, kindness and understanding.

My brain is sick.

Please forgive me if don’t act the same as you or the other lady you know with a similar disorder. Guide me lovingly so you can understand what I’m going through because I’m more confused than you.

My brain is sick.

I didn’t do this to myself. I didn’t take a magic drink one day and decide I’m going to be bipolar today and for the next 10 years I want to struggle in silence in my head. I wouldn’t have wished my challenges on my worst enemy.

My brain is sick.

Please be patient with me. I’m learning how to cope with life’s struggles. How to care for myself. I need to understand so I can try hard to get better.

My brain is sick.

Please love me anyway, and don’t tell me I’m using it as an excuse. Get information on what is happening. Help me. My brain is sick.

We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.

Thinkstock photo by twinster photo

TOPICS
JOIN THE CONVERSATION

Related to Bipolar Disorder

Portrait of a young woman suffering from insomnia

How I Get Through Bipolar Disorder Mixed Episodes at Night

It starts like an itch, and then my face is wet. It is not raining. The sky is clear, especially for this time of night. I am crying. Barely five minutes ago, I was laughing. The depression drowns out the mania and sometimes they mix like a cocktail, having the effect of making me sick. [...]
Vector illustration of woman with rainy clouds and her thoughts, airplane, concept idea

The 'Advice' I Don't Want to Hear as Someone With Bipolar Disorder

“Don’t be upset.” “Calm down.” “Smile. It’ll make you feel better.” “Stop getting all revved up.” Never in the history of ever has communication of this sort had the desired effect on a person – especially one with bipolar disorder. When you offer this sort of “advice,” what you are basically doing is telling the [...]
illustration of a man with a water in his head

When a Bipolar Heart Breaks

It’s not easy feeling so intensely. I try to pull back. I try to not feel this way. If I could feel less, maybe I would. They give me drugs that supposedly help me to feel less. I’ve been on drugs that do that even more, but it’s hard to go back to black and [...]
Rear View Of Doctors Talking As They Walk Through Hospital

Why Switching Primary Care Doctors Was Good for My Mental Health

A couple of weeks ago, I went to my new primary doctor. We changed counties, and my old doctor was more than 90 minutes away. Quite honestly, my nerves are not equipped to handle the drive there, waiting up to an hour to see the doctor, and then the drive back home in the interstate [...]