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Dear Younger Self: You Are More Than Your Dystonia

Dear younger me,

I was once where you are at. Feeling so alone. Like your world has just crashed. No one “understanding” you. I know how hard daily life can be living with dystonia.

And I know how hard putting on the “I’m OK” face can be, when in fact you’re not OK. You’re drowning in this life, looking for a way out. Feeling so worthless.

Don’t give up! Don’t allow dystonia to define you. You are more then just a label. More then just a diagnosis. I’m sure by now you have heard things such as “It’s all in your head!” or “You outgrow it!” or “Try this or try that!” Listen to me closely: don’t you give up. Don’t let any doctor tell you, “It’s all in your head!” or “Try this or that!” You stick to who you know you are and fight the battle head on.

Know that as you get weary on this journey Jesus is always near. Take His hand and walk with Him! Don’t try and do it all alone because it will be nearly impossible. No one can do it alone. Find those friends who love you for you. Right where you’re at. Though they may not always understand, they love and care for you! Let them do those things.

In your journey you will meet some amazing people you never knew even existed. Hang in there! Jesus is using you to help others. You will find on your journey that darkness will arise but that you’re so much stronger than any dark clouds in your life. I promise! Jesus didn’t just stick others into your life for no good reason. He has plans. Good, good plans!

When you’re sitting in the doctor’s office alone feeling so defeated, know that across the miles are others who care for you. And when you grow weary of having no answers, no cure, know you have an army fighting behind you daily. Please know you are more than just dystonia.

As you grow you will experience heartbreaks. They hurt, I know. Take those heartbreaks and help someone else by sharing your story. We don’t always know who is reading or who is watching us on a daily basis. So use your beautiful journey to help others. Take a deep breath because it will all be OK. Sometimes you have to go through some heartbreaks to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Keep going. Don’t you let others tell you what you can or cannot do. Dream big and keep your eyes on the prize. There are negative people all around you. Tune them out and stay positive. You’re stronger than you think. You are a child of the King and He loves you right where you are!

I know firsthand how hard living life with dystonia can be. At the age 25 it still seems impossible when someone wants to date me or loves me right where I am. Hold on, sweet one, because Jesus has plans! Though we can’t always see them, trust in Him and know that miles away there is someone praying for you.



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Thinkstock photo via pliona.