How Music Gives Me Hope in My Mental Illness Recovery

I sit at my desk, scrolling through pages of music, looking for that one song to get me into a great mood. Some days, I can listen to every type of genre. Then there are days I feel isolated and alone to the point when my music can be the only thing I hold on to. 

I’ve had depression and generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) for three years. I have a tattoo that says “When Words Fail, Music Speaks.” This was my first tattoo, and I got it to remind me what I love. Music has held me in it’s arms while I cry. It has taken my hand and walked in the darkness. Music has given my soul hope.

Music can evoke different kinds of emotions, and sometimes those emotions are the ones that float on by when I have a depressive episode. Whenever I need a moment to myself, I turn my music up loud, pick the best song that will reflect my feelings and just let it take me. Sometimes during moments of struggle, I don’t need make myself feel happy and fake. Instead I just need to let the pain happen, feel what is real and let the music help me.

Once I start to feel a little better, I can see things in a different perspective. I can analyze what I need to do to help myself and I can start feeling myself again. I know music is a constant. I know it will always be there in moments of trouble. I know there are songs that will say what I need to hear.

I know music will always be a way to escape and help me find peace. When words fail, music speaks. Music never lies. 

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