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My Depression Is Like a Sun Shower


What is depression?

I’ve heard it described a million different ways by a million different people. It is a “crushing sadness” for some yet an “overwhelming numbness” for others. It’s a “pessimistic attitude that can easily be changed” and also “complete apathy you have no control over.” It feels like loss and pain and nothing at all.

For me, depression is a sun shower… the cool rain on a warm, sunny day.

Have you ever experienced a sun shower?

Rain falls from a clear, blue sky. The sun shines and there’s not a cloud in sight, but you feel the mist on your face and watch the droplets flash as they fall. That smell, that beautiful smell of damp earth fills your nose and the flowers sway in a gentle breeze. The world around you is warm, light, summer and peace.

But it’s raining right over your head. You know there are clouds just beyond the horizon –the dark, looming storm clouds that send rain and thunder on the wind. And you feel their presence even on a perfect summer day. While everyone else enjoys their picnics and casual strolls through the park, you sit alone in a bubble… a snow globe where it only snows on you.

So when people ask, “What do you have to be depressed about on this beautiful sunny day?” tell them it’s a sun shower. That when all you see is sunlight, you can still feel the rain on your face.

And when all you feel are rain drops… remember to look up at that bright, bright sun.

Depression has a way of convincing me that all I know is rain.

But hope is my ever-present companion, like a shadow to a flickering flame.

You can’t have a sun shower without both the sun and rain.

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Thinkstock photo via phive2015