Kesha’s First Song in 4 Years Is an Anthem for Those Fighting Depression

Kesha is back after a lengthy legal battle with “Praying,” her first song in four years. In a post written by the singer for Lenny, Kesha shared how depression, anxiety and a “relentless” eating disorder inspired her latest song.

“‘Praying’ was written about that moment when the sun starts peeking through the darkest storm clouds, creating the most beautiful rainbow,” Kesha wrote on Thursday.

“There were so many days, months even, when I didn’t want to get out of bed,” Kesha said, describing her depression symptoms. “I spent all day wanting to go to sleep, and then when I did fall asleep, I had horrible night terrors where I would physically cry and scream through the dark. I was never at peace, night or day.”

The singer also described how she came to realize she needed help:

I know that I was never abandoned by my fans, my animals, or my family, but when you are depressed — really, truly depressed — you feel like you have nothing. Even having my kitties sleeping next to me in my darkest of hours couldn’t bring me light. It is in these moments when even the most cynical among us are forced to turn to something other than ourselves — we turn to prayer, or something like it. You look past your shame, past your desire to hide, and admit you need help.

Kesha has long been open about her experience living with mental illness. In May, the pop star shared an essay with Teen Vogue about how social media has affected her mental health.

“It became a vicious cycle,” she wrote of reading hurtful comments posted online. “When I compared myself to others, I would read more mean comments, which only fed my anxiety and depression.”

“I hope this song reaches people who are in the midst of struggles,” the singer shared in a message to fans. “To let them know that no matter how bad it seems now, you can get through it.”