When You Worry Your Mental Health Is an ‘Inconvenience’

This piece was written by Becca Martin, a Thought Catalog contributor.

You know those times when it feels like the world around you is crashing down and the walls are caving in? When it feels like nothing you do can help you escape from the hole you’re in. When it feels like you don’t belong in this world and you’re constantly feeling misunderstood, like no one else around you understands what’s going on in your head and you don’t want to try to explain because you don’t want to be a burden.

But sometimes they can tell. The people close to you can see through your endless lies that everything is “OK.” They can see you’re struggling no matter how hard you try to have it together because you can’t fake everything.

But you try. I try.

I just talk myself into believing it’s a moment of weakness, that I’m really OK, that I’m stronger than this. I tell myself to just get it together, that I’m feeling sorry for myself, that I’m making things worse in my head. I tell myself I need to stop looking at the negative side and be positive, I need to be appreciative over what I have because I really have no reason to be upset.

But sometimes you don’t need a reason because there realistically isn’t always a reason you feel a certain way.

So I put on a fake smile, I go out with your friends, I try to be happy because that’s what I’m supposed to do. I fake like I’m having fun so I don’t burden them with my feelings because the last thing I want to be is an inconvenience.

I don’t want to inconvenience everyone else’s good time, I don’t want to inconvenience people by spilling my problems on them, the last thing you want is to be an inconvenience.

No one wants to say the words, “no, I’m not OK” when asked if they’re OK because it’s associated with being “weak.” with admitting your flaws, with not being capable of fixing your own problems.

But the truth is, it takes strength to admit you’re not OK. It takes a lot of courage to talk about what’s going on inside your head.

The problem is admitting you’re not OK can make some people uncomfortable and people disconnect themselves from things that make them uncomfortable — unless they truly care.

Admitting your struggles makes you strong. It’s OK to not be OK. It’s better to openly admit you’re not doing well than it is to suck back your tears and let your emotions build up until you’re alone in your room at night crying into your pillow while you feel like you’re drowning in your own world.

At some point you have to stop beating yourself up over what you could have done better, you have to let go, you have to forgive yourself because things won’t always work out in your favor, but they’ll work out some way or another.

Just because you break down sometimes doesn’t mean you’re not a strong person. It makes you stronger because you’re accepting what’s going on in your life and you’re facing your fears of openly talking about it.

You can be worried about being a burden, an inconvenience, but the people who are truly there for you, the people who truly love you, won’t ever think you’re a burden and those are the people you need surrounding you.

Don’t assume no one cares and no one wants to help because they do. I promise you – you’re not an inconvenience.

This story is brought to you by Thought Catalog and Quote Catalog.

We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.

Unsplash photo via Quentin Keller

Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.

Related to Mental Health

Watercolor Fashion Woman with Long Hair. Vector Illustration. Beautiful Mermaid Face. Girl Silhouette. Cosmetics. Beauty. Health and spa. Fashion themes.

When You're Left Carrying Your Parent's Emotional Baggage

In 2005, my husband and I picked up a connecting flight in Puerto Rico on the way to our honeymoon destination, St. Lucia. I remember standing at the ticket counter when a porter kindly offered to help us with our bags. Being young and naïve we allowed him to do so… and he literally rolled [...]
Leave Me Alone sweater

How to Take 'Me Time' Around the Holidays, Even If You Don't Have a 'Leave Me Alone Sweater'

If you’re an introvert or someone who needs plenty of alone time, being involuntarily thrust into the hustle and bustle of the holidays can be overwhelming, to say the least. For many people, the change in routine can be hard on your mental health, and the pressure to see family and friends can be too [...]
worried teen girl and supportive mother

How to Help Your Child Through a Mental Health Crisis

I’ve come to realize that many parents actually don’t know how to help their children through a mental health crisis or what they can do to help before the crisis is reached. At the time of my own crisis, no one realized what was happening until it was too late and at the time, I [...]
double exposure of woman and winter trees profile portrait

Why Mental Illnesses Are More Than Just Words in Casual Conversation

There are a lot of words in the English language that are overused or misused — love, hate, literally, like. Those are just a few examples. But, there a few words that either frustrate me or stop and make me think when I see them being used out of context. They’re used in phrases we [...]