10 Things You Need to Know About Loving Someone With Bipolar II Disorder


Love isn’t always easy; it takes patience, compromise and understanding. Loving someone with bipolar II disorder takes a special type of person. It is often chaotic and can be very confusing.

1. My feelings are often intensified.

I will love you harder than anyone possibly could, but I also hurt that way. Loving someone with bipolar II can be amazing; I will show you all of the love and affection in the world. Sometimes, I won’t be able to show you the love you have come accustomed too. I will become distant, irritable, anxious, depressed. When this happens, you need to love me harder. I am not trying to push you away.

2. I don’t understand how I am feeling.

I wish I could explain and tell you what is wrong, but the truth is I just don’t know. I know this is confusing for you. On the days when everything goes right and I am just not OK, I wish I could turn it around. I am working on it.

3. I know how hard my mental illness is on you.

I might not say it enough but I am so grateful for your support, understanding and love. I know my erratic mood swings, depression and hypomanic episodes take a toll on you. I often wish I could make it easier for you and I feel guilty that I cannot.

4. I don’t always know when the depression hits.

Sometimes I feel like giving up. The depression is debilitating; sometimes, I just want it to end. There is nothing you can do to make it better except support me through it.

5. I feel ashamed and embarrassed by my disorder.

It is hard to feel good when you are uncomfortable in your own skin. There are days when I feel like I have to wear a mask just to get through.

6. My disorder is not an excuse but sometimes it is the reason.

My chaotic behavior can sometimes be draining for you. My diagnosis does not excuse my behaviors; however, it can be the reason for it. Please don’t give up on me.

7. I overanalyze everything.

I am in constant need of reassurance. If I ask if you are mad at me or if we are OK, it is not because I have done something wrong. My brain creates irrational scenarios that play out when they are not even happening.

8. I find it hard to talk about.

It is not always easy to talk about my invisible illness, simply because I do not always understand it myself. It is embarrassing, and I feel guilty. If I confide in you, please know how hard that was. Understand that although it may seem irrational and ridiculous to you, it is very real to me.

9. I want you to remember the good times.

There are going to be times when I am so easy to love. Cherish these moments and remember them when it gets hard.

10. I love you more than you could possibly imagine.

Maintaining a relationship with a person with bipolar II disorder is possible. It is important you are educated on what the disorder entails. Read as much as you can, talk to your partner and be there for them. Most importantly, know when you need support.

Follow this journey on the author’s blog.

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Photo by frank mckenna on Unsplash


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