To the Friends Who Love Me When Depression Makes It Hard to Love Myself
This piece was written by Kara Skye, a Thought Catalog contributor.
Thank you for still seeing me behind tears, unanswered texts, and the same T-shirt for two weeks. For still calling me beautiful with my unbrushed hair and blemished skin from being too sad to take care of myself. For being the ones to take care of me.
Thank you for recognizing my healing is not linear. My mental health journey is full of loops and twists and mountains. It’s a roller coaster and it is a carousel. Through all the rushes and lulls I am blessed to have you all to climb into the seats and strap in with me. To hold my hand through the climbs, and to scream and holler together through the drops. Thank you for becoming part of my journey so I don’t have to take it alone.
Thank you for loving both of my faces. You love me for the kind, warm, free-spirited, open and smiling girl you first met. You still love me when I am the cold, closed off, silent, brooding and anxious person I hate. You are teaching me both faces are me, and you’ll love me through both. You help me to realize that even when it’s hard to accept myself, everyone else loves me no matter what. So I learn to love that girl too.
Thank you for being there for me no matter what. Whether it’s to just lay in my bed with me while I stay silent and think to myself, or to listen while I cry and sob about why I don’t understand why I am this way. You are the definition of through thick and thin. You keep me grounded when I start to float away. When laughing is the last thing I want to do, you find a way to make me smile. And when I feel too ashamed to show my tears, you are prepared with your shoulder and a tissue box to assure me that it’s OK to let it out.
I hope you know I feel blessed by you every day. I can’t imagine where I would be today or if I would be today if it weren’t for you. I am who I am, and I am continuing forward thanks to your support. And I will always be the same for you, and more.
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Unsplash photo via Priscilla du Preez