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What I Want You to Know If You’re Not OK Right Now

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It is OK to not be OK.

It is OK to fall apart sometimes, to have moments with your cheeks pressed to the bathroom tiles, wondering how you got there. It is OK to veer off course with question marks in your eyes, not knowing where you are going next. It is OK to feel your heart cleave in two, to wonder how you will put the pieces back together. It is OK to cry until your ribs ache, to sit with sadness and ask it what it wants. It is OK to say I need you, I’m struggling, lend me your ear, hold my hand.

People paint pictures of perfection because they have been told to live and look and love a certain way. It is OK to not live and look and love like them. Do not compare your reality to their highlight reel because even though it may not always be apparent, they have days when they are not OK, just like you.

It is OK to feel bruised; it does not mean you are the expired apple in aisle nine that needs to be discarded. It is OK to feel different; it does not mean you are any less deserving of good things than everyone else. It is OK to ask for help; it does not mean you are weak and spineless and in a state beyond repair.

It is OK to feel flawed and failed and fearful and confused and broken and lost and let down, and it is also OK to feel nothing at all. These things do not define you; your goodness and warmth and kindness and compassion and creativity and honesty and heart and every other big and small wonderful thing about you do.

It is OK to not be OK. You will be OK again soon.

Originally published: August 3, 2018
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