What I Want You to Know If You’re Not OK Right Now


It is OK to not be OK.

It is OK to fall apart sometimes, to have moments with your cheeks pressed to the bathroom tiles, wondering how you got there. It is OK to veer off course with question marks in your eyes, not knowing where you are going next. It is OK to feel your heart cleave in two, to wonder how you will put the pieces back together. It is OK to cry until your ribs ache, to sit with sadness and ask it what it wants. It is OK to say I need you, I’m struggling, lend me your ear, hold my hand.

People paint pictures of perfection because they have been told to live and look and love a certain way. It is OK to not live and look and love like them. Do not compare your reality to their highlight reel because even though it may not always be apparent, they have days when they are not OK, just like you.

It is OK to feel bruised; it does not mean you are the expired apple in aisle nine that needs to be discarded. It is OK to feel different; it does not mean you are any less deserving of good things than everyone else. It is OK to ask for help; it does not mean you are weak and spineless and in a state beyond repair.

It is OK to feel flawed and failed and fearful and confused and broken and lost and let down, and it is also OK to feel nothing at all. These things do not define you; your goodness and warmth and kindness and compassion and creativity and honesty and heart and every other big and small wonderful thing about you do.

It is OK to not be OK. You will be OK again soon.


Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.


Related to Mental Health

man laying in water with burning pieces of paper falling around him

When Depression Invades Every Part of Your Day

I wake up, disappointed that I’m still alive. My hands feel chained to the bed. I just don’t want to get up and face the day. Closing my eyes and staying in bed seems like a very inviting option. I feel like there’s no way I would survive this. But then, life doesn’t offer me [...]
the girl in the hat beanie. the double exposure effect with a gradient

The One Phrase That Completely Invalidates My Struggle With Mental Illness

I’ve heard this phrase all my life. When I’d be young and hungry and complain that I was starving and kick up a huge fuss, and my mum would say “Some people have it worse, you know.” Of course, she was right. I wasn’t starving. Actually, I’d barely be hungry, I’d just say I was hungry so [...]
woman with blue hair looking down

When You Experience 'Reverse' Seasonal Affective Disorder

Finally, it’s spring. The buds are budding, the grass is growing, the harshness of winter gives away to the gentleness of warmth and regrowth. So why am I not happy? Well, I have something I like to call “reverse” seasonal affective disorder. You know how the winter blues are so common? The depression and lethargy [...]
flowers in small vase resting on path

How It Felt to ‘Graduate’ From Therapy for Depression Today

I came to your office for the first time today. I was nervous. As I pushed the elevator button and waited to be taken to the third floor, my stomach dropped. I was ashamed that I needed this. I met you and we clicked. You told me I was smart for realizing I needed therapy [...]