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16 Things People Don't Realize You're Doing Because You're Emotionally 'Numb'

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What is ā€œemotional numbnessā€?

Mighty contributor Elizabeth Duff shared how she defines it in her piece, ā€œWhen Depression Makes Me Numb, Not Sadā€

One symptom I wish more people understood is feeling numb. A sense of hollowness ā€” like a dull, numb lump ā€” often defines me when Iā€™m really down. Itā€™s a shitty, zombie state ofĀ grayĀ flatness. Life passes by and you wonā€™t bother to wave at it because you donā€™t really care. In fact, you just donā€™t really feel anything.

Sheā€™s not the only one who has felt this way, so we asked our Mighty community to share something they do because theyā€™re emotionally ā€œnumb.ā€ You can read what they shared below.

If you can relate to feeling numb, youā€™re not alone. Whether youā€™re struggling with numbness from a struggle with mental illness symptoms, the impact of trauma, grief or something else, we want you to know we see you.Ā We are so grateful youā€™re here and in our community. If youā€™re struggling, we encourage you to post aĀ Thought or QuestionĀ about it on the site to get support from other people in our community who get it.

Here are things people donā€™t realize youā€™re doing because youā€™re emotionally ā€œnumbā€:

1. You Isolate

ā€œI isolate myself behind the ā€˜introvertā€™ behavior when really, Iā€™m hiding. Iā€™m barely out in public. When I do, itā€™s usually forced ā€” shopping, events or errands. I make myself go out to do those things. Point A (work) to point B ( home) is all I focus on.ā€ ā€” Janelle F.

2. You ā€œOverreactā€ or Donā€™t React at All

ā€œIā€™m in the ā€˜either orā€™ modeā€¦ either I overreacted or I donā€™t react at all.. I can be functional with a smile, but inside Iā€™m completely numb.ā€ ā€” Ashley W.

3. You Have Trouble Hearing and Processing Whatā€™s Going on Around You

ā€œWhen I go numb, I basically stop hearing and stop processing most of the world around me, going into work mode so people just assume Iā€™m busy or in a bad mood.ā€ ā€” Cathryn C.

4. You Donā€™t Laugh Out Loud Anymore

ā€œSomething Iā€™ve noticed Iā€™ve been doing lately is not reacting externally if, say, I watch a funny YouTube video, but I can still feel myself laughing internally. Itā€™s like my brain knows itā€™s funny, but I have no outward expression whatsoever.ā€ ā€” Katie S.

5. You Are Extra Forgetful

ā€œDay-to-day Iā€™ll be extra forgetful, forget to message people back, have to ask people to repeat things and might seem like Iā€™m not listening when Iā€™m actually just not present. I get extra clumsy too and tend to knock things over or walk into things. When Iā€™m conscious itā€™s happening and canā€™t seem to get back to reality, I tend to switch onto self-destruct mode to try and get some feeling back.ā€ ā€” Harriet L.

6. You ā€œZone Outā€

ā€œI zone out to the point Iā€™m only physically there, but mentally elsewhere and emotionally dead. I will just sit and not interact with people or my surroundings. If Iā€™m walking, I will hold onto the person and thatā€™s the only way I stay with them.ā€ ā€” Raven M.

7. You Have No Desire to Date

ā€œA different one for me is dating. Some donā€™t understand how I can go such long periods of time being single, without even showing interest in dating, but it was the last thing on my mind.ā€ ā€” Amanda Z.

8. You Sleep a Lot

ā€œSleeping in the middle of the day.ā€ ā€” Emily S.

9. You Pick Fights to Feel Something

ā€œPersonally, when I go numb, I try to pick fights with my fiancĆ©, in order to get a reaction of emotion, since I canā€™t feel any emotion myself and me trying to push him away since I am uncomfortable with myself. Then, once the battle is over and my numbing state is satisfied, it is as though I come back, with a full experience of emotions, and begin to cry because I feel so horrible for words I didnā€™t mean, despite not being able to explain what happened. Overall, it seems like for a brief time, I lose myself completely and all control of my mental processing.ā€ ā€” Autumn T.

10. You Put Yourself in ā€œRiskyā€ Situations

ā€œSomething people donā€™t realize Iā€™m doing because Iā€™m emotionally numb is placing myself in risky situations. Iā€™m willing to come to harm physically and/or emotionally so that I feel something ā€” anything ā€” other than the ā€˜nothingnessā€™ of being numb.ā€ ā€” Louisa T.

11. You Seem ā€œRoboticā€

ā€œI say exactly what I am thinking. I turn into a robot I have very little empathy and my body language and voice are flatlined. When I am numb like that, Iā€™m usually trapped in my head ā€” sitting, staring and waiting to come back to myself.ā€ ā€” Nicole S.

12. You Experience More Anxiety and Panic Attacks

ā€œHaving panic attacks instead of feeling negative emotions. I donā€™t like being mad or sad. Iā€™m numb to those negative emotions because of trauma and PTSD. I just get anxious instead.ā€ ā€” Liz T.

13. You Distract Yourself Frequently

ā€œI begin to distract myself by playing games on my phone, or I clean. I do whatever I can because I become so uncomfortable I cannot sit in the anxiety and discomfort.ā€ ā€” Dana B.

14. You Have Trouble Following Social Cues

ā€œI interrupt. I donā€™t hear lots of what is happening, I have trouble following social cues and I just interrupt people.ā€ ā€” Kristy G.

15. You Self-Medicate

ā€œI pretend Iā€™m happy and not affected by the situation at all, while I go numb myself physically with substances.ā€ ā€” Lauryn L.

16. You Seem ā€œEmotionlessā€

ā€œIā€™m totally emotionless. I donā€™t get excited, or show facial expressions.ā€ ā€” Justin L.

If youā€™re struggling with feeling ā€œnumbā€ youā€™re not alone. We are so grateful youā€™re here and in our community. If you need support, we encourage you to post aĀ Thought or QuestionĀ about it on the site to connect with people in our community who get it.

Originally published: September 27, 2018
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