Complex Post-traumatic Stress Disorder

Yesterday I found out that I could also freeze while standing up…

I was overwhelmed and wanted to go to the medical office.
But I froze infront of the door dor 10 minutes complete paralysis.
It took me 20 minutes to reach the call button and push it.
My legs trembled and shook

A nurse came and gave me ammonia to smell (which helped on Friday where I was frozen completly for one and a half hour…).
It was so strange talking to her while I couldn’t move my legs as they trembled and shook.
The ammonia worked but afterwards I had an asthamatic attack, which wasn’t so enjoyable…

I told a nurse and she said to buy an spiky metal ball. I hope it can help, as my skills are slowly dwindling…

#MentalHealth #Depression #MajorDepressiveDisorder #CPTSD #SocialAnxiety #Catatonia #FND

Yesterday I found out that I could also freeze while standing up…

I was overwhelmed and wanted to go to the medical office.
But I froze infront of the door dor 10 minutes complete paralysis.
It took me 20 minutes to reach the call button and push it.
My legs trembled and shook

A nurse came and gave me ammonia to smell (which helped on Friday where I was frozen completly for one and a half hour…).
It was so strange talking to her while I couldn’t move my legs as they trembled and shook.
The ammonia worked but afterwards I had an asthamatic attack, which wasn’t so enjoyable…

I told a nurse and she said to buy an spiky metal ball. I hope it can help, as my skills are slowly dwindling…

#MentalHealth #Depression #MajorDepressiveDisorder #CPTSD #SocialAnxiety #Catatonia #FND

When I was in school even in college, there were boys being rude to me & I was bullied. All the men I liked throughout my life made comments about the way I look and they were very attractive men. I am diagnosed with Schizophrenia Bipolar. I stay home and don’t do much because I have had so many people be rude to me especially men. When I was younger my cousin put on pornography in front of me and yes I do watch porn. I used to pose as other girls online and men would be so nice to me and when I showed them a real picture of me; I get shrugged off or even blocked. I was in and out of mental hospitals, self harmed, suicidal thoughts, several different diagnoses. I do consider myself different and a child of special needs. I almost got attacked in school by men too for no reason like they wanted to beat me up. I am close to 30, a virgin and never had a good looking attractive man ask me out or give me the time of the day. It makes me feel bad about myself like I am not pretty or good enough because I have been called ugly so many times and no men that I ever liked pay interest in me. My nationality is Guyanese (West Indian). It sucks that I was made this way but hey I guess they say looks aren’t everything.

#MentalHealth #CheckInWithMe #Selfharm #BipolarDisorder #Depression #Anxiety #SchizoaffectiveDisorder #Schizophrenia #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #Disability #PTSD #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Psychosis #SchizophreniaSpectrumPsychoticDisorders #MajorDepressiveDisorder #Bipolar2 #BipolarDepression

That is me in the picture :/

I woke around 3:20 am as my roommate was calling someone as she was awake…
She fell asleep pretty quickly.
After fourty minutes of worrying in bed,
I got up and read some poetry, then changed the side of my bed to fall asleep.
But I’m still awake…

It’s currently 5:30 am.
I’m dead tired but too wired to fall asleep.
So for now I’m just laying here staring at the wall…
Hope I can get some sleep as I need to wake up at 8:30 to 9:00.

We‘ll see…

#MentalHealth #Insomnia #SocialAnxiety #Depression #CPTSD