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25 Things People With Chronic Illness *Really* Want for Valentine’s Day


As soon as the first Valentine’s Day decorations go up in stores every year, grumblings about “Hallmark holiday” and “commercialism” often follow. But really, Valentine’s Day is just an opportunity to show the people in your life a little extra love. And the gifts that mean the most to them rarely require a trip to the mall. Sometimes your loved ones just need signs of your support and understanding, especially if they live with health issues.

Recently, we asked people in our Facebook communities who live with chronic illnesses for their ultimate Valentine’s Day gifts. This is what they divulged:

1. “I would love a pain-free day so I could really focus on my husband… He does all he can to take care of our two young girls and me and handles every new roadblock of my illness with caring and grace, but I would like a day where we could just be those two young kids that we used to be, without a care in the world.”

2. “A back rub, sleep and some light-up unicorn slippers. (If I’m always in PJs, they might as well be epic!)”


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3. “To have the energy to spend the whole day with my kids and take them out without needing the following two days to recuperate.”

4. “Aside from having a fantastic, pain-and-symptom-free day, having someone to come over and have a chill Netflix night and chocolate would be most desirable.”

5. “I would love somebody, anybody besides my therapist to say: ‘I understand. How are you feeling? Can I do something to help you today?’ Kindness is what I want.”

6. “Twenty-four hours in a hotel suite. Jacuzzi, dinner in my room, sweet plush bed and glorious, uninterrupted sleep! And a killer massage.”

7. “For people to show compassion.”

8. “One full day without fatigue.”

9. “A maid. I know that sounds selfish, but I’m really struggling to keep up with chores, and I don’t really have any one to help. My husband tries, but after a long day at work, he’s pretty tapped out, too.”

10. “I would love to be able to plan something for Valentine’s Day and know I can follow through with the plan instead of canceling because it’s a hard day.”

11. “I would like my invisible illness (fibromyalgia) to go away and never come back.”

12. “A home-cooked meal and the kitchen clean and tidy to follow. That tells me someone really knows me and will make an effort to make me happy.”


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13. “A day where everyone would believe our pain is real and we are not lazy.”

14. “A cure for chronic migraines!”

15. “Pain-relieving chocolate.”

16. “Just to get a hug, a nice meal and to sleep in. In that order.”

17. “I would like someone to take out my trash. And take the can to the road for pick-up. That would make my day.”

18. “To have a loved one who understands what you’re going through or reads up on your condition so they know how to help you the most.”

19. “A massage. A healing, soothing massage.”

20. “I want to enjoy my family without feeling terrible and eat what I want.”

21. “Just one day with no pain, plenty of energy, no anxiety, no sadness or tears, no nausea and no itching.”

22. “Acceptance.”

23. “I would like a card and chocolate or flowers from someone who cares.”

24. “I would like a day where my entire family understands what I am going through, [with] no judgment on their parts, and to just spend the day with me no matter how I am feeling.”

25. “I just need someone to show they care.”


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What would you like for Valentine’s Day? Let us know in the comments below.

Editor’s note: Some answers have been shortened for brevity/clarity.