To the Person Who Pushes Me to Fight Lyme Disease When I Don't Want To

To the person putting up with my Lyme disease,

Thank you…

Thank you for being there with me, and not just for me — even if it’s on the other side of the door as I cry. Thank you for noticing when I’m not “all right” or “OK.” Thank you for not making me tell you what’s really wrong, but letting me tell you on my own time.

Thank you for checking in on me when I’m not OK, and then not taking my word for it when I say “I’m fine.” Thank you for your persistence when I’m being stubborn.

Thank you for helping me find something today to be happy about, even when I didn’t think it was possible when I rolled out of bed. Thank you for sticking by my side, even when I don’t want to do anything but cancel our plans and watch a movie, or talk about the deep questions of life. Thank you for always having answers to my deep questions.

Thank you for listening. You don’t try and fix my problems — we both know you can’t — which I think is part of the reason I have such a hard time opening up to people about how I’m feeling. But you strive to understand. And for me, someone who is at least trying to understand, even though I know it is impossible, is one of the greatest gifts I can be given.

Thank you for being you. I can’t always be myself, even though I always want to be. And even though I can’t always be that way, you are still yourself around me. You don’t pity me. I don’t want that. You don’t overstep bounds in trying to help. You are you, and that is all the help I need. So thank you for being something “normal” in my life, because “normal” is something I am in short supply of.

Most of all, thank you for noticing when I’m trying. I know you do, because you are more helpful during those times. Thank you for being there for me when I most need it. This battle would be so much harder without you.

I have learned that every day is a constant battle with my chronic illness. And since that is the case, it’s OK to lose some battles, and to even lose some days. And with you checking in, it helps me know that I am OK, and even though today might have been a loss, I have people that care. And that makes all the difference. So thank you…

I am not a warrior without the people that surround me, pushing me to fight during the times when I most don’t want to. This is directed towards many individuals who have stood by me, and are still standing by me. I am grateful and blessed because of it.

two women standing in the middle of the road
Sadie (left) and a friend.

Follow this journey on Blame the Tick.

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