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Anxious in a Crowded Room

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My body is shaking, and I don’t understand why.

It’s trembling despite the fact that I’m wearing two layers of clothing.

I can’t remember the last time I felt this way.

So out of control.

Gasping for the closest thing I recognize.

Any familiar face.

There are way too many people here.

When did it become so crowded?

When did all these people arrive?

My eyes are beginning to tear.

My lips trembling.

I can see my chest moving up and down.

Faster.

And faster.

I’m starting to hyperventilate.

Everything is pulsing.

I keep searching in what seems like a sea of unfamiliar bodies.

And within seconds it takes over me.

My mouth is dry, but I need to speak.

My legs are stiff, but I need to sit.

I need to gather my thoughts, but my mind is racing.

A sudden touch.

A familiar voice.

An anchor.

Brings me back.

And I’m safe.

The Mighty is asking the following: What is a part of your or a loved one’s disease, disability or mental illness that no one is aware of? Why is it time to start talking about it? If you’d like to participate, please check out our Submit a Story page for more about our submission guidelines.

Originally published: May 23, 2016
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