What I Want You to Teach Your Children About People With Food Allergies

I lie here, weeks before major surgery, worried what would happen to my kids if something goes terribly wrong. My husband is wonderful and quite capable, but they need their Mama, their food allergy warrior. I have trouble drifting off to sleep. I dream of a good outcome. I dream of hugging my children after surgery, letting them know everything will be OK.

My kids both have life-threatening food allergies. I don’t just worry about the normal things parents worry about. I worry every single time they eat or drink something. That’s every single day. Every single bite. Every single sip.

It’s an endless amount of fear and anxiety that you face, an endless fight to figure out how to keep them safe. A fight, like many others, that you cannot possibly understand unless you’re going through it yourself.

I also have food allergies, as does my husband, but we never took them seriously until our precious children got them. You learn to adapt and educate yourself very quickly when your children’s lives are at stake. 

You’re surprised to learn that only a very small amount of their allergen can kill them. 

Now let that sink in.

A few tiny particles of food can kill your child.

How would you feel if you got this news?

It is a daily battle of preparing many homemade foods, reading labels, calling food companies to verify whether or not cross-contamination exists in their factories, making sure your kids are included and safe and protecting them from bullies (adult and child) they may encounter in person or online.

It’s a battle I wish we didn’t have to face. It’s a battle I wish none of you had to face. But the reality is that many of you will someday. One in 13 children currently have food allergies, according to Food Allergy Research & Education. It’s something we all need to participate in and be prepared for.

Even with the prevalence of food allergies, many still don’t understand the dangers involved or don’t even care to try to.

Because it doesn’t affect them.

Many still view food allergies as something that’s OK to make jokes about. They ridicule those afflicted or even bully children or the parents of kids who suffer. Food allergies affect a person’s ability to eat, drink, breathe, thrive and survive. It’s not something to joke about.

I worry about the struggles my children will face trying to stay alive every single day when there are so many things that could harm them. Everyday things such as food, drinks, lotions, shampoos, peanuts or other allergens on airplanes, events, parties and even dental visits could wind up becoming life-threatening due to certain hidden ingredients.

I haven’t had enough time to educate my young children on how to stay safe. As I prepare to have surgery, I pray I will get more time to continue that education. I pray I will be able to supply them with enough knowledge to lead healthy, productive and happy lives.

I also hope anyone reading this will try to put themselves in my shoes. What would you do to keep your children safe? I believe the answer would be — anything! 

So please understand that food allergies are real, serious and life-threatening. Food allergy families are only trying to protect their children from harm.

Be compassionate and helpful to these parents and any parents handling any type of disability or challenge. 

Teach your children that bullying because someone has food allergies, or for any other reason, is unacceptable.

Lead by example.

Don’t bully or joke about those with food allergies or other disabilities, and maybe your children will grow up to be kind, empathetic people.

It all starts with you and how you treat people. 

Treat them well.

Remember, we’re all in this together. We’re all facing challenges with something.

As I prepare to have surgery, I pray this message will reach many. I pray my children will survive and thrive no matter what happens. I pray I will be OK and wake up from anesthesia to a more tolerant and humane world.

Please help this dream become a reality.

Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.

Related to Food allergies

Tracy Boyarsky Smith's children

The Conversation You Should Have With Your Neighbor With Severe Allergies About Birdseed

Who doesn’t love to see a cardinal flitting through their yard on a crisp summer morning. You sit at your table, sipping that fresh cup of coffee, and the sunlight is shining through the trees and reflecting off the window pane. It’s a storybook moment. So inspired by nature’s beauty, you refill the birdfeeder, doing [...]
Kristine Lukanich’s husband and children

To the Teachers Who Are There for My Family as I Care for My Son With a Rare Food Allergy

Five days a week for the past 10 months, we have dropped off and picked up two of our kids at school. For 32 and a half hours every week, we have put our children in the hands and care of someone else. Someone who started off as a stranger. Thirty-two and a half hours.  [...]

To the Fast Food Employees Who May Not Pay Attention to Special Orders

This is one aspect of what it’s like for my child (and me) to live with the possibility of anaphylaxis, a serious, life-threatening allergic reaction. An anaphylactic peanut allergy is bad enough. It limits everything from bread to ice cream and more. There were only a handful of fast food and sit-down restaurants we could go to when [...]
loaves of bread

To the People Who Don’t Take My Wheat Allergy Seriously

I can’t eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. If I do, my airway will shut down. I am, in fact, quite allergic to it. But it’s not what you think. I don’t have a peanut allergy. I’m allergic to the bread. I’m allergic to wheat. I can eat peanut butter all day long and [...]