Why I Sometimes Can’t Shake Hands


The handshake has been around for a very, very long time. And it’s the customary thing to do when you meet people for the first time. The problem is, sometimes I can’t shake hands.

On days that my arthritis is acting up, you’ll notice my hands aren’t really doing anything. You won’t find me reading a book in bed. I won’t use the remote to fast forward through the commercials. And I’ll try to shoo the dogs away when they want to be petted.

Now if I have to go out somewhere that particular day, I’ll try to stay away from people so I don’t have to hug someone I know or shake hands with someone I don’t. Arthritis days can make someone very unsocial, just not on purpose.

The thing about arthritis is that the possibility of pain is always hiding under the surface just waiting to strike. And when it does, it’s hard not to give into it.

It’s not like my fibromyalgia pain. When that strikes, it forces me to be bedridden until it goes away. With arthritis, it’s a bit different. There are still dishes to be done, dinners to be made and laundry to fold. And in my case, I have an adult child with special needs who requires assistance throughout the day. That’s not something that I can just say, “No, I won’t do that today.” So how do I go about my day when the arthritis in my fingers is so bad that I feel like I want to cut them off?

It’s usually a good day to enjoy things like frozen pizza. It’s easy to cook for a family and doesn’t require any special preparation. Or I’ll microwave a batch of precooked chicken wings.

As for the dogs, instead of scratching them on the head, I’ll just pat them. That requires no finger joint movement. As for the laundry, well, that can simply wait. And that goes for all of the household chores. They’ll be taken care of once my fingers allow me to do so. Fortunately, for me, my arthritis pain usually only last for a day or two. I know that others, like my friend, Sonya, can’t say that. Theirs is an everyday challenge.

It also helps that I have an understanding spouse who is willing to pitch in and take over when I’m not able to. For that, I am very grateful.

Lead photo source: Thinkstock Images

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