The Love I’ve Seen in Hundreds of Hospital Visits With My Child


Hospitals are just as part of my motherhood experience as local parks. I’ve walked their corridors hundreds of times. I’ve been in pre-operation wards to post-operation wards.

I’ve sat in genetic doctors’ offices, along with neurologists, speech pathologists, orthopedic surgeons and more.

I’ve watched my child as she was wheeled into the operation room. I’ve tried to soothe her as they place the anesthesia mask over her mouth as she tried to fight it. I’ve watched her wake post-operation in a hysteria. I’ve carried her fragile body in heavy half-body casts. I’ve tried to hide any feelings of worry and anxiety as she looks to me for help.

I’ve meditated in waiting rooms.

I’ve prayed for strength.

I’ve cried with my husband as this side of the journey hurts.

I’ve surrendered in deep trust.

I’ve sat in respite rooms and practiced deep breathing.

I’ve seen parents pushed to exhaustion in waiting rooms and hospital wards.

I’ve seen chaos in the pre-op room, heard cries of children in fear and families not knowing how to manage.

I’ve waited in post-op rooms with other parents who are nervous, worried and concerned.

I’ve walked out of the revolving doors of the hospital in tears, or elated, or angry or stronger than before — depending on what was going on with my daughter’s care at the time.

I’ve danced out of the revolving doors when she was released from the hip-spica (half-body) cast.

I’ve walked past cancer wards, sat in intensive wards and lay down in the prayer room.

Looking at this image reminds me of the fullness of our journey. How far we have come. Only moments before, this room was full and chaotic.

We have no idea where our journey is heading, how long our daughter will be with us. But of everything I have seen and mentioned above, I’m always guided back to one thing — love.

The love from a parent to their child in a hospital is palpable, and it’s quite extraordinary to bear witness to it.

The love I’ve seen in my hundreds of hospital visits highlights the incredible human spirit — what we are capable of as parents and equally what the children are capable of after everything they endure.

We’ll always have love. And in my time as a special needs mum, it’s been my absolute saving grace. When all else is lost, and I’m scrambling on my knees trying to piece back all the parts, I find love.

To all the parents out there who love fiercely — I see you, and I see your love. Thank you.

Follow this journey at Chiara’s Journey and Miracle Mama.

We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.


Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.


Related to General Parenting

former president barack obama giving his farewell address in chicago

8 Quotes From Obama's Farewell Address That Give Me Hope as a Special Needs Parent

January was a busy month for politics. We watched former President Obama say farewell, Donald Trump take office, millions of women march and rally, and we watched a nation in political tension. As I scrolled through my political newsfeed tonight, I came across President Obama’s farewell speech and read it from a different perspective. I [...]
Student wearing backpack, walking down hallway at school

What the Report Card for My Child With Special Needs Doesn’t Say

I don’t like report card day. Why? Because it doesn’t show a complete picture of my child. It reminds me of an IEP meeting where all the therapists focus on the challenges my child may face. “But what about all she has learned?” I want to scream. Report cards are like that to me. They [...]
mom and daughter at doctor

The Strength It Takes to Make Life-Altering Decisions for Your Sick Child

As the mother of a very ill child with special needs, I am constantly faced with decisions. Some are easy. What outfit do we put her in today? What color cast do we choose? Will she like to take a drive or walk? Others are not so easy. And for some of us, the difficult [...]
audience with hands in the air at a music festival

How Live Music Helps With My Self-Care as a Special Needs Mom

I have a secret… On the surface, I am a wife, a mother of two, and a full-time professional in a fairly high-stress career. I am a college graduate; a home-owning, tax-paying citizen. I do all the “typical” mom things — shuttle kids to and fro, cook dinner, pay bills, clean the house — exciting stuff, right? [...]