When You're in Pain, It's OK to Let Others Love You

Today is one of those days when I need love, and more importantly, I need to let you love me. I am usually an outgoing fun loving person, but since my accident… I am turning into a closed book.

Do I like to talk? Hell ya! I love having chats. When I stand at a bus stop if you even look at me I will say, “Good morning. Nice day. How are you?” Same on the bus, at a play area with kids to other mums, at work meetings, at lunches…I would like to believe I get on well with people. I like to listen. I am very interested in people in general. I love to see people do well in life, to be happy. Sometimes I need to listen more, as I said yes, I do like to talk. Is this a bad thing? I don’t think so.

My painful condition, complex regional pain syndrome, attacks me all day long. It consumes my brain. It suddenly takes over. You want to talk to someone, but the pain is so distracting, it is difficult to concentrate. I hear you say, “You don’t need to concentrate to speak to someone,” but I think you do. Otherwise it’s a case of, “She is not even listening. She is not interested or doesn’t care what I am saying.”

My sister said to me yesterday, “Please tell me how can I help you.” Actually, I think she said it twice. She is a busy mother herself so I am sure she has zero time to help anyone other than her own family. But even saying it to me, I realized I don’t actually ask for help as I feel it tough to start up that conversation.

Today I tried a little bit harder and I had around three adult conversations, and do you know what? I enjoyed it. I laughed and the pain was forgotten about for those few minutes. The best one was with my sister.

Pain can change you, change your personality, shy you away from your friends. I will never give up fighting! I love my life and everyone in it to much to back down.

If you are feeling down today for any reason, please know it’s OK to let others in and love you.

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Thinkstock Image By: lorenzoantonucci

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