A Letter to Parents of a Child With Depression


Dear Parents,

I know how hard it is for you to have a child with depression. I know how hard it is for you to watch me in pain and not know how to help. I know how hectic your lives get. I know neither of you are perfect, and you have your own struggles to face every day. I know you try to understand what I am going through, but I have to let you know there is no way you ever will, but I will try my best to explain it to you.

Every morning I fight a battle within myself to get out of bed. Some days I easily prevail, and other days the depression wins and I cannot will my numbing limbs to move. The day continues and constantly I can feel the pull within me to go back to bed. My love of school has vanished and has become another area where I let myself down. My mind doesn’t work like it once did, and I can’t keep everything straight. I make bad choices in my never-ending search to find moments of happiness. You may think I am actively throwing my life away when really I am just trying to keep my head above water. When I call you spiraling out of control, it’s because I don’t know who else to call and I am scared that depression is going to win. I know those calls are scary to get, but I need you to remind me I am still alive and breathing and I can win the next day. Remind of the times I’ve done great, and put things in perspective because in those moments I cannot see anything except for darkness and I need you to shine a light. Once I can breathe again I would love to work on building foundations and structures to help me swim back to shore, but in that moment of struggle, the thought of all the work it will take to get back to shore is terrifying. When I am scared and underwater I say and do things I regret, I have a hard time communicating and am sensitive beyond belief. I know it is not easy, and sometimes I don’t deserve it but sometimes all I need is a bright light to guide me to the surface — a light of hope that I am still me, that I am not a failure, and that it’s OK to not be perfect.

You are the brightest lights in my life, and everything you do for me never goes unnoticed. You have loved me at my best and at my worst, and I will always be grateful for everything you do.

If you or someone you know needs help, visit our suicide prevention resources page.

If you need support right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, the Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386 or text “START” to 741-741.

We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.

Thinkstock photo by Ademortuus

TOPICS
JOIN THE CONVERSATION

Related to Depression

Illustration of a woman

The Complicated Truth of My Anxiety and Depression

I recently had an interesting conversation with a friend. We briefly touched on the topic of mental health, and he told me how it can be hard to be a person of faith who lives with depression and anxiety. He told me how medical treatment felt like a “lack of faith.” This small conversation struck [...]
portrait of woman laughing in nature and sunshine

Why Using Humor to Answer 'Are You OK?' Helps in My Mental Illness

We live in a society where “How are you?” has become a greeting instead of an actual question; it is sometimes said in passing with no real expectation of an honest answer. Those times, it is asked only out of social nicety, and from my own personal experience, I can say that when you have [...]
Portrait of young woman sitting at table in front of laptop, sleepy

When I Realized I Overworked Myself to Distract From Depression

I would like to say that my workaholic tendencies stem from watching my father work as much as he did during my upbringing, that as a child I was a sponge and what I witnessed was then ingrained in me and I was bred this way. Sure, I can place the onus on my upbringing [...]
Watercolor of Glasses Girl

4 Misconceptions I Believed About Mental Illness Before I Was Diagnosed Myself

Before I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, I believed some seriously false assumptions about mental illness. It wasn’t until my personal experiences didn’t match what I thought I knew about mental illness that I realized I was wrong about so much. Here are just a few things I used to believe, and what I’ve discovered. [...]