Why I'm a Firm Believer That 'Everything Happens for a Reason'


The “everything happens for a reason” debate is one that is disagreed on, argued over and lurking around every corner, among those with chronic illness and everyone else. Here, in light of respectful conversation, I am going to share my stance, how I came to it and why I’m standing firm.

Firstly, I do believe that everything happens for a reason, so I am a member of the “for” side of this debate. You are not obliged to share my opinion, but I would like to tell you why I have it.

I have had many experiences in my (short, so far – I’m young!) life, some good and some not so much, and I believe each of them has shaped me, moulded me and led me to today.

Some of my hardships I can directly link to new opportunities and experiences they have created for me. For example, being chronically ill has given me the opportunity to write for The Mighty, has planted the seeds for passion that might, one day, lead me into motivational speaking and I think it has made me a generally more empathetic and compassionate person.

 

A little more specifically, having to use a wheelchair at 13 has given me a valuable perspective on what accessibility is like, and has created some of my proudest moments. Being ill enough to have to leave school and go back a year later gave me time to move across the country, where I had a much more impressive range of subjects to choose from. Having a genetic condition has led me to learn about and consider fostering and adoption, something I hadn’t thought much about before, and probably never would have, had I not been forced to, but might just lead me to the child whose mama I will be.

On a smaller scale, falling ill made me stop karate (my sport of choice!) and freed up my time to explore other avenues, like writing, a passion I am glad to have found, but might have missed out on if I was still kicking and punching every night of the week.

My hardships have given me grounding and trust in the people who love me, and have strengthened my relationships with them. They have shown me I can be brave, regardless of how infrequently I feel like I can be. They have shown me what I care about in this world, and have helped me to filter through the little things that just don’t really matter (I’m still learning with that one!).

I could go on, and then I could get lost, because I do not know the reason for everything. I cannot verify why some things happen, good and bad, and why they happen to some people instead of others. I do not have a plot map for human life, and I cannot draw lines that tie everything together neatly.

That is the beauty.

I do not know everything. Everything is still waiting to be discovered, and there is so much of it that I will never find it all; there will always be more to look for. Though I can’t perfect my links, or my causes and effects, I believe they are there, and maybe one day a few more of them will become apparent.

I believe I am being led somewhere, and I am excited by all of the prospects of my destination.

Perhaps I believe that everything happens for a reason because it helps me to cope with life, but isn’t that itself a reason for my believing?

The reasons for my everything are not clear to me, and I cannot see them, but not for a moment do I doubt they are there.

I reiterate: you do not have to agree with me, but if you do, I would love to know some of the the reasons you have found for your everythings.

We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.

Thinkstock photo via StasyNineriver.


Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.


Related to Chronic Illness

US capitol building

3 Ways I Think the AHCA Could Affect Those With Pre-Existing Conditions

Editor’s note: This story reflects an individual’s experience and is not an endorsement from The Mighty. We believe in sharing a variety of perspectives from our community. The Congressional Budget Office just released its report on the impact of the American Health Care Act (AHCA) in regards to the economic repercussions of the bill. The [...]
water colored woman

15 Pieces of Advice From a 'Professional Patient'

My business card says “professional patient.” I get so many questions about this. What does that mean exactly? To me, I have acquired skills and knowledge that healthy people don’t always have. Having chronic migraine and pain has exposed me to situations that many others never have to face. When your health turns suddenly, a [...]
woman sitting on the couch with her head in her hands, looking frustrated

When 'Pacing' Myself Doesn't Make Much Difference With My Health

Sometimes it feels like people are constantly telling me how best to “beat” this thing. Doctors, nurses, specialists, family, friends – all telling me how to get my illness in check and under control. All offering up an opinion. All offering up advice. All telling me what I should be doing. All reprimanding me for not doing what they say. But [...]
Woman takes selfie.

The Instagram Account That Inspires Me on Tough Days of My Illness

I encountered @YooCanDoAnything by chance. It was a bad night but not in the traditional sense. Most people’s bad nights would be due to a bad grade or a breakup, but my bad night was from a flurry of symptoms hitting me right at once. It wasn’t just a bad night, it was a hopeless [...]