The Storm of Depression Can't Make It Rain Forever

It’s like a storm that begins small.

Just a few sprinkles, easy to ignore.

Then it grows into bigger drops.

Pretty soon it’s a large storm, capable of destroying everything in its path — including me.

This storm is difficult to pass through. The lightning strikes are the monsters of depression screaming inside my head. The thunder rolls and it’s what keeps me awake at night. And I’m exhausted.

My depression is telling me I’ll never be good enough. It hushes me by telling me nobody wants to hear about how horrible the storm is, how big it has become. I’m trapped inside the storm, and it’s as if there is no end in sight. I’m terrified of what it can grow into.

I want to reach out. I want to scream. I want to tell somebody, but I have no voice. The thunder will make my cries for help unable to be heard. That doesn’t stop me from trying. Small phrases like, “I don’t want to go to practice today,” or “I’m just really tired,” are all I can manage to say in hopes someone will pick up on the cues I’m struggling and need someone to help me.

I want this storm to be over. I want to be free from the monster of depression that’s taken up residence inside my head. I want to see the sunshine and feel as though I am strong again.

But right now, the only thing getting me through this horrific storm is remembering the phrase, “Be strong now because things will get better. It might be stormy now, but it can’t rain forever.”

If you or someone you know needs help, visit our suicide prevention resources page.

If you need support right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, the Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386 or text “START” to 741-741. Head here for a list of crisis centers around the world.

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Thinkstock photo via Archv