What I Need You to Know If You're Trying to Comfort Me


To the person trying to comfort me:

You say, “It will all get better,” but when I do not know how I will make it through today, that can be so hard to believe. There is a part of me that desperately wants to hear you and know that what you are saying is true, but my anxiety is so strong I cannot help but doubt it. And reminding me to breathe can only help so much because lots of the brokenness lies beneath the surface.

I know I am lucky to have you and that is why I apologize so frequently. I am afraid you might leave me because all of this is too much for you to deal with. I know you always tell me it’s all OK and you don’t care and you just want me to be OK, but I cannot help but feel like you are lying to me because my anxiety wants me to think everyone hates me.

I can be a mess. I won’t try to deny it because it’s easier to accept this way. And sometimes I feel like my struggles greatly outweigh my blessings. No matter how much you remind me that all of this cannot last forever, I will still forget that the struggles have to end eventually.

I know I can talk to you about anything, but sometimes a text isn’t enough. There might be times when I don’t want to talk at all. There might be times when all I want is to hear your voice because it is so hard to calm down when the voices in my head are louder than the world around me. Most of the time it can be hard to hear you calling my name because I have let the voices get so loud.

I am struggling with myself and against myself and I’m still trying to stay afloat. I am unsure of the future, a fight against the waves that are trying to pull me under, and I think I lost touch with who I really am. I don’t know where I want to go tomorrow or five years from now, so it makes sense I have no idea how to possibly get there.

Uncertainty is my greatest enemy and right now I am fighting it alone and I think I lost part of myself in the battle. I am afraid of change and I don’t know what that means for the future, but I do know that, whatever happens, I want to have you by my side.

We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.

Thinkstock photo via Wavebreakmedia Ltd


Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.


Related to Anxiety

woman sitting on couch sad upset depression

4 Things I've Learned From Having Anxiety

Intrusive thoughts. Excessive worrying. Dizziness. A racing heart. I’ve lived with the effects of anxiety for so long that these kinds of symptoms seem almost normal to me. I can still remember sitting at my desk in elementary school, my little hands sweating and twisting against each other as a feeling of doom would nearly send me [...]
woman on a swing under autumn tree,illustration painting

How Abuse From My Childhood Affects My Anxiety as an Adult

Editor’s note: If you have experienced emotional abuse, the following post could be potentially triggering. You can contact the Crisis Text Line by texting “START” to 741-741. I didn’t have an ideal childhood. When I was 8, my father left. He was physically abusive towards my mother and siblings and myself, he was sexually abusive [...]
Map of London Underground

Transport for London Releases New Map to Make Travel Easier for People With Anxiety

For many people living with anxiety, using public transport like crowded subways and undergrounds can be difficult. On Wednesday, Transport for London (TfL), London’s transportation department, released a new map of the London Underground designed to help those living with claustrophobia or anxiety. Our new #TunnelMap can help you plan a more comfortable journey if tunnels make [...]
young woman head in hands looking worried against wooden wall backdrop

How Not to Deal With Anxiety Procrastination

Dealing with anxiety and depression means that a lot of those “everyday tasks” pile up on me. Some days, I’m too tired to deal with anything and I spend the day in bed. Other days, I waste so many hours on stressing and ruminating over all the things I have to get done that by the time I have [...]