To My Boyfriend, Who Loves Me Through My Anxiety
When I’m feeling anxious, I admit I’m not the easiest person to get along with. Sometimes I feel bad that I put on this front for the world, but you get the raw, unfiltered, anxious side of me. It makes me want to push you away because I tell myself how it’s fair that you get the worst side of me simply because you love me, when everyone else gets the best. This causes me to look for reassurance on topics you don’t think you need to clarify, but I’m constantly looking for validation that you still love me because I’m so afraid you’ll leave.
I know I get emotional and I often let it out on you since I feel so comfortable with you. It’s not even that I’m mad at you, but it’s because I’m feeling overwhelmed or upset about a situation and my anxiety takes over. Sometimes I feel like you’re my emotional punching bag and although you absorb my blows, I feel like I’m hurting you.
Thank you for loving me through these dark moments and guiding me back into reality, away from the torment of my anxious thoughts. You make me feel at ease and it’s so comforting when you help calm my anxious mind. I hope you know how much your continued patience means to me because it’s hard for me to express it in those moments.
You’ve been with me through it all, and saying thank you does not even begin to describe my gratitude. Being with you motivates me to be a better person, to continue to work through my anxiety even on the days I feel hopeless. I want to be better because of the strength you give me. You inspire me to change the world, like you’ve changed me.
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Thinkstock photo via Archv.