How Being Thankful Helps Me Through the Tough Days With Illness
Sometimes I get sick and tired of being sick and tired and when those days come, I have to sit back, check myself and realize I have so much to be thankful for. I am thankful to have one more day to see the faces I love. I get another chance to feel something, even if it’s only pain. I am thankful I have made it through seven surgeries. The part fellow spoonies may not like is that I am thankful at times to my illness.
Yes, yes, I know pseudotumor cerebri and epilepsy really suck, but they’ve helped mold me into the woman I am today. Sick or not, that is a woman I can be proud of. A woman who knows more about myself then I would have ever known at this stage in my life. It has shown me just how strong I really am. And that I can conquer all obstacles in my way.
On top of that it renewed my faith in God. I have gone to church all my life but in hindsight I think I got to a point where I was going through the motions of prayers and church, and everything I’ve gone through shook my reality and that earthquake renewed the faith I have in God.
I can thank PTC and epilepsy for showing me what real friends are and the true meaning of family. The most important of the reasons I am thankful to my illnesses is that I am more self-aware then ever before and definitely more than most of the people around my age. It’s odd how something so horrendous can make us all into something so beautiful. I had a theology teacher once tell me that the world would be a much better place if people saw the amazement in every moment instead of the strife. Doing that has given me a sense of peace that is priceless.
I wouldn’t trade the understanding of myself, the love I feel, the peace and the closeness with my loved ones for anything. And that is why I am thankful. That is why on the hardest days I will turn to this feeling instead of the sadness that can overwhelm me on the worst, pain-filled, emotional days. Changing the way you think really can change the way you feel – sometimes even if it’s just for a little while.
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Thinkstock photo via m-imagephotography.