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When People Think You're 'Too Bubbly' to Have Depression

“But you’re not sad all the time…”
“Your personality is so bubbly though…”
“You’re so talented. You can look past it…”

When I tell someone I have depression, they do one of the two things:

1. Stay awkwardly silent.


2. Deny, deny, deny.

People can have a hard time associating a human being, with whom they confide or know, with “actually” having a mental illness.

I am by no means saying thus is their fault — no one could possibly ever completely understand what they have not gone through themselves.

What I am referring to, is when an individual denies what the other person is feeling, based off of their own feelings.

Whether they believe it or not, it may seem very belittling to the other person. It may leave them with the impression that the individual pushed those struggles aside like they are not worth anything.

Personally, I would rather be given an awkward silence any day of the week. It may be awkward but, at the same time, there is an unspoken respect in that.

They aren’t telling you how you are feeling. They may not be saying anything because some sensibilities are just hard to put into words. We have all had those moments.

Also, there is something I need to point out. Just because someone is not wearing an indefinite frown and singing a sad song all day, doesn’t mean they aren’t coping with depression.

From experience, I know I’ve acted happier in situations when I’ve been the saddest within. It’s kind of like a defense mechanism — I put on my mask. I’d rather stuff more pain inside and burden myself, instead of express to those around me I am feeling depressed and burden them.

There is this one short saying I think can express all of this very well:

“Sometimes the happiest people are the saddest on the inside.”

I’m going to state this roughly. I may have a bubbly personality, and I may have talents, but that does not mean I am not injured on the inside. There have been times when I’ve been in a lonely room with new scars, wishing my life were over too.

Unsplash photo via Noah Buscher

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