To Those Who Judge My Illness: Sit Down While I Rise Up
You say I’m lazy. You say I’m a liar. You call me a drama-seeker and tell me it’s all in my head. You call me these things on a daily basis, but I’ve become immune to your hate. Please, you don’t know the half of what I go through!
Imagine waking up sick one day and never getting better.
Imagine being told there’s no cure for you and the pain isn’t temporary!
Imagine being awake at all hours of the night, praying to whatever higher power you can think of to take away the pain even if it’s just for an hour.
You call me an addict because I take pain pills for the pain. Please, you can have it all because that stuff doesn’t even touch my pain.
You tell me a little exercise will solve all my problems. That if I lost a little weight I’d feel so much better. Please. Why don’t you try to run when your lungs feel like they’re collapsing.
You think you know my story but you don’t know the half of it. Until you experience sleepless nights, a period that never stops, pain that can’t be touched, sit down.
Until you look nine months pregnant because you ate some chocolate, sit down.
Until you experience your insides being stuck together by a disease people can’t comprehend, sit down.
Until you’re gasping for air on the floor because your lungs won’t let you breathe, sit down.
Until you’ve been dismissed by friends, family, doctors and peers, sit down.
Until a doctor tells you your illness hasn’t killed you yet so you must be OK, sit down.
Until you’re told to find Mr. Right and have kids because that’ll somehow fix all your problems, sit down.
Until you watch your chances of ever conceiving slowly dwindle every single day, sit down.
Until coughing up blood is a normal thing for you and people don’t think twice about it, sit down.
Until being strong is the only choice you have, sit down.
Until you’re thrown into medically induced menopause at age 14 and told it’s your best option, sit down.
Until you look in the mirror and see your illness’s side effects covering your body from head to toe, sit down.
Until you know endometriosis, sit down!
Life has no pause, fast word or rewind button. I’m stuck with this disease. This disease that won’t kill me but can make me wish I were dead. You don’t know pain. You don’t know struggle. You don’t know desperation.
You tell me I’m weak but I’m the strongest person in the room. I’ve lived every day in pain since I was 12 years old and I’m still standing. You can’t shake me. I am invincible, unbreakable, unstoppable, unshakeable. Your negativity can’t touch me, it can’t bring me down, it can’t stop me. You’re gonna know my name, my journey, my worth. I am one in 10 and my story deserves to be heard.
My Name is Gage Paslay and I am 27 years old. I’ve been struggling with this invisible illness called Endometriosis since I was 12 years old. It’s chronic and I deal with pain everyday. There is no cure for it so it will forever be a part of me and it’s something i’m going to have to deal with for the rest of my life. I have good days and bad. It takes 7 plus years just to receive a diagnosis and its often misdiagnosed. Over the years i’ve received different diagnosis and i’ve been on countless medications and treatments that haven’t worked. Luckily, I was finally diagnosed correctly In December of 2016 by laparoscopy, the only way to determine if you have it or not. However, it made my symptoms worse and I am now looking into excision surgery. My blog is really about bringing awareness to this debilitating chronic invisible illness. 1 in 10 people assigned female at birth have Endometriosis and so many of them haven’t received a diagnosis yet or they are waiting to have another surgery. Endometriosis impacts people in almost every aspect of their lives. How, when and if we can have children. How our cycles work and how long they may last. It gives us pain sometimes so debilitating we can’t even get out of bed in the morning. It messes with our mood. It also impacts our relationships with family and friends. It sometimes overpowers us and defines who we are. So this page is about me speaking out for myself and for everyone struggling from any kind of chronic illness. You aren’t alone. Together, we have each other. I know what its like to have no one, to feel like you are stuck in a dark hole and no one is willing to pull you out. I’ve been there. I want to show light to people who are struggling, I want to encourage others to speak up and stand up for themselves. This disease shouldn’t define us and it shouldn’t control us. You shouldn’t feel guilty for being sick because it’s not your fault. I struggle everyday AND i’ve survived every bad day I thought I couldn’t get through..I’m rising up everyday and so can you. If you’re interested in finding out more about Endometriosis, watch my videos, read my blogs and follow my journey. If You are a Endometriosis Warrior like me, follow me. Share them with your friends and family. React to them. My voice is one in many but I’m determined to make sure its heard. This is me taking a stand against anyone who has ever told me “Its all in my head” or “I’m overreacting” or “It ’s just period cramps”. #I’llRiseUp.
gagepaslay