To the Momma of a Sick Baby

I know who you are now, I see you.

I see the exhaustion behind the smile you wear, I wear it, too.

I see the countless hours you spend just sitting with your child because you can’t bear the thought of them being alone.

Mother holding a premature baby at the hospital

I know the non-medical degree you have earned yourself from researching the diagnoses, medications, complications, risks and outcomes.

I hear your silent cries at your child’s bedside when you think nobody can hear you because you don’t want to be a burden.

I hear your prayers turn to anger then back to thankfulness in an instant because that’s just how quickly things change.

I know the momma guilt you carry because you have other children; they need you, but she needs you more. I know.

I know you never expected this life, you never thought you were strong enough.

You never thought it could happen to you, this is somebody else’s story you are living.

I known how alone you feel because truly, nobody can understand unless they have gone through this experience and it’s something you would never wish on anyone. You don’t want people to understand, but you do because you feel alone.

I know you long for the day when this will all be a distant memory, but you don’t really know if or when that day will come.

I know the uncertainty breaks you.

I know who you are, I know you can do this.

You are not alone.

I know.

Follow this journey at James’ and Julia’s Facebook page.

Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.

Related to Traumatic Brain Injury

Comic illustration by Teresa Reilly in which she explains TBI to her nephew.

How My Young Nephew Supported Me After My Traumatic Brain Injury

I sustained a traumatic brain injury — an epidural hematoma — in March 2014. An emergency craniotomy saved my life, but I was left struggling with both the shocking trauma inflicted by the brain injury as well as a recovery from a difficult brain surgery. A few months after I was released from the hospital, [...]

Finding Acceptance Seven Years After My Traumatic Brain Injury

On April 25, 2011 my life changed in an instant.  I lost control of my car after hitting black ice.  The car rolled three times down an embankment and then hit a tree. That tree most likely saved my life. The car would have rolled about 200 more feet, then dropped into a deep ditch. Given that [...]
Sad student walking on college campus.

I'm Young and Chronically Ill, Not a Dropout

If I had a dollar for every complaint I’ve seen on social media from my college aged friends about finals, I could pay for their schooling they seemed so bothered by in cash. Now, I understand how stressful exams can be and they have every right to complain about this time in their education, but [...]
Woman with red curly hair in blue coat and black round sunglasses in city.

5 Things People Don't Realize I'm Doing Because of My Traumatic Brain Injury

Brain injuries come with a lot of symptoms that impact survivors 24/7.  There are some obvious and not-so-obvious things survivors may do as a result of those symptoms.  The people in my life are used to the obvious; taking Tylenol, struggling with word recall, going to bed at 9 p.m. — but these are the [...]