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When Someone Said, 'I Wish I Had Your Body'

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Today, I got told by someone, “I wish I had your body.” So many thoughts came rushing to me, yet I had no words. So, it stayed with me, everything I should have said.

Often we compare ourselves to others without knowing the whole truth.

See, my body, a body that has undergone 13 surgeries due to bone cancer since the age of 12 to now 36. My body, the one with a total femur replacement and 16-inch scars on each side of my thigh. This body that is chronically ill and tired with lymphedema due to all those surgeries and years spent stuck in a bed till it could learn to walk again.

This body that has to wear compression 24/7 to make sure it doesn’t swell. This body I have to move, yet rest at the same time so I don’t totally crash and burn and have to spend days in bed. This body that has to wear heels all the time, and yes, I look very stylish and hot, but it’s been a product of losing range of motion, so walking in flats is nearly impossible. So, others assume I’m just high maintenance and vain. This body that, at moments, is ridden with the worst of pains. Would you still want my body after knowing all this?

Why do I share this, you may ask. I’ve had to learn to love the same body that feels like it’s constantly betraying me. I’ve had to come to terms with it and learn to worship it and be grateful because it got me here. This body that carries this mind and soul that keeps pushing me to dream and never allows myself to get to such a broken place that I cannot pull myself out of it. This body knows love and has experienced some of the most beautiful moments one could dream of.

Next time you think you wish you had someone else’s body and you hate on your own, remember we never know what someone has truly lived or what they cover up because it’s the only armor they know. Take a moment to appreciate that body of yours. For it’s carried you to this moment. Because with all its flaws, it’s also so beautiful and incredible. Truly a work of art. After all, we are all perfectly imperfect. Bask in the glory of that.

Original photo by author

Originally published: April 9, 2021
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