16 Cures for Autism That Without a Doubt Work

For some reason, many family members, friends and even complete strangers seem to have strong opinions about the causes and best “treatments” for autism. And many of those same people are not shy about sharing their advice with every autism parent they meet.

The Mighty asked our readers for some of the most ridiculous “cures” or “treatments” for autism they’ve been offered.

Here’s what they had to say:

1. “Don’t give him anything else to eat. He will eat when he’s hungry. This was from a doctor too.” — If You’re Flappy And You Know It Facebook page

2. “The best/worst one I have heard is simply, ‘They just need a good spanking,’ because, you know, hitting your kid makes a disability go away.” — Lucas Rainey 

3. “I had a friend that was told she should give her autistic 5-year-old camel milk to cure her autism…” — Donelle Butschli

4. “‘Send her to my house for a week or two and we will fix that problem!’ Many, many times. Apparently our parenting gave her autism.” — Missy Compeau Bonaguide

5. “‘Going organic’ will cure the autism…” — Leidy Jesse Garcia

6. “Karate. My mother-in-law thinks karate will cure autism. Now, let’s make a list of all the things she thinks I did wrong to cause it in the first place.” — Suzanne Winkowski Zoerb

7. “I heard another parent say, ‘I know if I could just take her to see the dolphins and she could look in their eyes, she would be cured.’ It turns out I have a better poker face than I thought. I did not hold my side or roll around on the floor laughing.” — Laura Bryant Sneden

8. “Magnet therapy. This stranger struck up a conversation with me, and when I mentioned my son has autism, she said she had a friend who took care of a little boy who had autism because his mom did drugs while she was pregnant, and the friend took the little boy to a place where he laid on a table with magnets all around his head, and his autism was cured.” — Kim Osburn

9. “Mostly prayer. If prayer worked like people think it does, then what’s the point of having diseases? So that deities get more ‘likes?’” — Bailey Annan Sonday

10. “Wheat grass juice.” — Darlene Stauffer

11. “I work with children with autism and have a special needs child of my own. I heard a teacher say one of the students with severe ASD just needed ‘boot camp, and a good kick in the shins.’ Whaaaaa?” — Casey Sidebottom Jennison

12. “Getting rid of our dog. Her barking has caused our son’s autism and sensory processing disorder.” — Katie Little Knobl

13. “Stick him in a sauna for an hour daily for two weeks to flush out the mercury.” — Lindy Burnett

14. “I was told if my son ate broccoli it would cure him… LMAO. Yeah. Ok.” — Donelle Butschli

15. “Chemical castration.” — Kristine Semelis Weiskopf

16. “The most ridiculous one is that they need to be cured. I would never want to change my son! He’s perfect just the way God made him. Autistic children are beautiful, sweet, intelligent, loving, caring. It’s not them who needs to change… it’s society! Maybe if this world had more people like them, it wouldn’t be so filled with hate.” — Cynthia Rogers

Editor’s note: This piece and its headline are designed to be satirical.