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What This Man Can Teach Us About Accepting Autism and Disabilities

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This man right here is my hero. I don’t know his name. Or anything about him, actually. Let me explain.

After a hot and tiring hour (not day — hour. That equals an eternity in Fletcher time) at a “Day Out with Thomas,” Fletcher, my autistic nonverbal 9-year-old, was hungry. So we spent an exorbitant amount of money on chicken tenders and fries and headed to the food tent to eat.

Fletcher ran ahead, passing all of the open seating to plop down nearly on top of a nice man who was sitting alone. I attempted to coax Fletcher into another seat, or even move one seat away, but he was not having it.

Fletch absentmindedly started to pat the man’s back. I apologized and redirected. The man was unfazed. Fletch then rubbed the man’s arm. I again apologized and tried to move him. The man said it was not a problem, no need to apologize. Then Fletch tried touching the man’s hair, so I physically got up and started to move Fletch while explaining his autism. This man stopped me. He told me point blank, “You do not need to apologize or explain. He is happy. I am happy to sit here with him. Enjoy your food and relax. Do not apologize again.”

So, we sat. Fletch tapped and patted the man. When we were all done I thanked him and he just smiled and said, “Never feel like you have to apologize for being yourselves.”

We live in a world where individuals like Fletch are often seen as an inconvenience. Let’s all take a note from this man and live in such a way that we can all be unapologetically ourselves.

Originally published: September 15, 2022
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