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You're Allowed to Have Bad Days

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I am someone who is prone to feeling guilty. For example, if I haven’t had a “productive enough” day, or if I have said something that could possibly be misconstrued by someone else – I will often feel bad about it. This also includes feeling guilty about being upset because of my disability or having tough times with my mental health.

I have cerebral palsy, and I also deal with depression, anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). When it’s put like that, I sound like a bag of laughs, don’t I? Anyway, my point is, these are all things I can (and often do) feel guilty about.

If I fall over because of my disability, I am often sent on a downward spiral of self-pity and upset. I feel useless, pathetic and weak. But after that comes the guilt – I have accepted that I have cerebral palsy, so why am I feeling like this? I’m still “better off” than many in the world, so what right do I have to lament and cry about it? I am an adult, not a baby.

It is the same on the days when my mental health is going through a rough patch. If I feel low and unmotivated, if I have a panic attack or cannot shake a constant feeling of dread, or if I give in to another compulsive routine – I feel like I have failed. I feel guilty and sad about it, I get frustrated with the way I am and hate that I am like this.

There is now something I try to remind myself though: You are allowed to have bad days.

Let’s face it, human beings are flawed, and no one on this Earth is perfect. We cannot always be strong, happy, brave and “push through.” Sometimes we just need time to feel bad… and to be OK with that.

It sounds cheesy, but I like to believe in the idea of Yin and Yang – we need the bad to have the good. In this same vein, negative emotions and bad times are just as important as positive emotions and good times.

So, whatever you are going through, whether it is physical or mental illness, disability or disease – I hope you aren’t too hard on yourself when you have those bad times. Let yourself have them, and get back to it another day.

Follow this journey on Orrigoshi.

Getty image by Ekaterina Kotlova.

Originally published: November 8, 2018
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