40 Simple Tips to Start the Year Off Right If You Have a Disability

These tips were inspired by my previous post and Marianne Power’s perceptive book, “Help Me.” You probably know them all already, but don’t forget to remind yourself as needed:

1. You should never have to prove your worth to the right person. You’ll never be everyone’s cup of tea.

2. If it hurts you, it hurts you. There is nothing wrong with feeling deeply. There is nothing wrong with being caring or compassionate. Just make sure others reciprocate the same time and energy back to you.

3. Trust your intuition. Never settle.

4. Know everything we experience is temporary. Even feelings.

5. Life does not come with a manual, so lean on others as you need to. Surround yourself with love, laughter and people who will fight in your corner when you need a rest.

6. Sometimes no matter what you say, they might not just be ready to listen.

7. Experience life as it happens; embrace every bit of the weirdness.

8. If you have to force it, let it go.

9. Get out there and explore. Go.

10. The mind likes to recreate the familiar, but if a habit is not serving a useful purpose, change it. That includes how you talk to yourself. Once you’ve said it to yourself or to someone else, it can be hard to take it back.

11. Stop that spiral of negative self-talk and overthinking. Right now.

12. Eat the carbs and the salad. Get up early and exercise but also treat yourself to a lie in. Life is about balance.

13. Even when you feel overwhelmed, remember you’ve got this. Think of what you’ve survived up until now.

14. Picture how different your life would be if you did not fear rejection, change or even fear itself.

15. Don’t build an identity based solely on your challenges. You are not your problems. Do not seek to confirm them.

16. Don’t try to be perfect, be you.

17. Take calculated risks.

18. Don’t play the “if… then” game, act now. What is the worst that could happen?

19. Know your worth! You do not need to fix yourself. You are not a bad person. Stop treating yourself as if you are. You are not letting anyone down.

20. Don’t over-analyze life, live it too. Get out of your head and be practical. Celebrate the present tense. See beyond the haze; you have everything you need.

21. Life and people will always surprise you.

22. Stop comparing yourself to others. It’s like comparing chalk and cheese. No two situations are the same. You don’t need to be anything more than you are right now. You have to live with yourself, there’s no getting away from it; so know this, you are enough, you always were.

23. Have a passion.

24. If you do not understand someone’s intentions, look at their actions. Look at how they treat those around them.

25. A life lived for others is always a life well lived. Play your part to lift others up. Be each other’s champions.

26. You cannot change someone who doesn’t wish to be changed; that is simply not your job.

27. Relax. Don’t let past experiences sabotage your current ones. Past pain doesn’t have to rear its head or rule your future choices. Feel it, process it and then move forward.

28. People remember how you made them feel. Make them feel good.

29. To me failure does not really exist, because you tried and you can always, always try again.

30. Sometimes take a step back, time provides clarity. Observe your thoughts but don’t battle with them. Turn down their volume. Breathe.

31. People only know what you choose to tell them, they are not mind readers. Effective open communication is key.

32. Be responsible for what you are responsible for, but don’t accept more blame than you deserve.

33. Take time out and treat yourself.

34. Worry only if the situation you are worrying over is actually happening to you then and there. Those possible scenarios you ponder in your head? Leave those.

35. Respect yourself enough to walk away when needed.

36. Unplug. Enjoy the simple things in life.

37. When you doubt yourself, practice self-compassion and self-care.

38. Accept all your little quirks.

39. Be proud of yourself.

40. It’s OK if you don’t know what to do. Everyone is winging it; nobody has all the answers. Every single one of us is figuring this life out together.